Our expert says:
You're allowed to let go of them at any time ; its best to let go of them early on, just as soon as you have learned anything useful from the experience.
Your bf doesn't sound very mature or stable, does he ? Having left you and told you it was over, he had no grounds for getting in a huff about you kissing another guy.
Then as a problem-drinker, hurtful,cheating, smoking - you didn't deserve any of that. If he is still hung up about it, that's pathetic, but he should see a counsellor, after being good enough to leave you and try to make it on his own. And you should separately see a counsellor, to get rid of all this inappropriate guilt he has taught you. I don't hear any slight trace of love on his side. Shouldn't you rather separate again and stay that way, while you work with a counsellor to enhance your self-confidence and self-esteem and self-respect, and to make a much better life for yourself ?
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