Our expert says:
I VERy much doubt that you're a crappy parent, let alone one of the worst. Really lousy parents never think there's anything wrong with their parenting --- that it bothers you proves that you are caring and of quality.
You provide her with genuione love, to an extent nobody else could. Go to the Maintenance Court and get the court to order the deadbeat dad to pay up and provide maintenance. Arrange to see a counsellor to work on your own low-self-esteem and low self-confidence, and to help you work out more effective ways of working wioth her and enjoying your time together. Stop buying her expensive toy stuff ; save that for education.
At 5 she is now, ( much more than at earlier ages ) likely to be bothered by an adoption, especially as kids tend to assume it MUST be their fauolt that any such thing has happened. Try Lifeline and other such free agencies ; and if your work medical aid provides for any counselling, make use of that, too. And can't the grandparents help ; indeed wouldn't they really want to ?
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