Our expert says:
I hope other readers can have some useful commetns and advice here, as it's no within my field of expertise.
Whats the current situation - he still has the same 2 kids - but are they currently looked after by the careless mother, and not actually living with you two ? Is it here that you have found it awful to have them live with you, such that you assume it would bee the same if you all koved abroad ? He'd need legal advice about taking the kids abroad, even if he did have custody, and you should at least check that out.
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