Our expert says:
Some of that you're describing is called enabling. Not expecting a druggie kis to pay his own way simply teaches him to be irresponsible, and to carry on wasting his life. ( does he work ? If not, why not ? If so, where does his salary go ? ) They need to read about Tough Love and similar concepts.
This "very nice woman" is really foolish if she doesn't recognize that he will remain on drygs and sponge off her for as long as she allows him to do so. What else is she expecting ?
Don't take responsibility, yourself, for his lousy choices in life - this is not something YOU are "putting your parents through" HE is doing so, and to a significant extent THEY are doing so by enabling and funding his bad and lazy behaviour.
You may well be right about the possibility of risk to the kid - maybe child welfare should be asked to lookm into this ? And what does the mother think about it ?
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