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Question
Posted by: unsure | 2010-04-25

what to do

I have been married just over a yr...My husband and i are both from different races. he is white Im asian. we dated for a few yrs travellled together and things have been grt.We have a gorgeous son together...

About 2 months ago i was involved in a smash &  grab. this incident really traumatised me. to date i have not seen a counsellor.
Beginning of this week I suffered a miscarriage &  I am now so depressed its affecting my relationship withmy husband &  son.

The problem is my husband has not even morned the loss of our child. he just carries onas if nothing has happened and that what happened is not affecting me.

I was forced to join a church cos that is his culture. his best friend joined a mormon church an now he is forcing me to join. i have nothing against this place its just that ever since i decided to go there bad things have started happenein to me.
I have begun to resent and almost hate myhusband cos of this...I dont knowwhat to do...

Please help, its as if i losing my family...

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Depression is a common problem, anyway, and the more so after the unpleasant experiences you have had. You deserve a proper assessment of your possible depression, preferably from a proper specialist psychiatrist, and advice on treatment, which may include medication and CBT style counselling.

As for your husband, some men don't react so much to a miscarriage, as its a less personal thing for them ; and many men just don't have much skill at showing their emotions and were brought up to not reveal them.

It is NOT a nomal feature of white culture to compel a wife to join her husband's church - it may be more an aspect of Mormon culture.

See to yourself first, and get proper expert attention to your depression ; then try to convince him to join you in marriage counselling to work on all the problematic issues between you

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010-04-26

Depression is a common problem, anyway, and the more so after the unpleasant experiences you have had. You deserve a proper assessment of your possible depression, preferably from a proper specialist psychiatrist, and advice on treatment, which may include medication and CBT style counselling.

As for your husband, some men don't react so much to a miscarriage, as its a less personal thing for them ; and many men just don't have much skill at showing their emotions and were brought up to not reveal them.

It is NOT a nomal feature of white culture to compel a wife to join her husband's church - it may be more an aspect of Mormon culture.

See to yourself first, and get proper expert attention to your depression ; then try to convince him to join you in marriage counselling to work on all the problematic issues between you

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