Our expert says:
Isn't it a pity that you so often only find out the really important things about a partner ( uncaring, serial cheater, e.g. ) when it's a bit too late ? Maybe this was part of the good sense of the old days when pre-marital sex was supposedly forbidden.
Sounds like you really needed, ages ago, and still need, good legal advice, especially about compelling him to pay maintenance and maybe repay you for what you paid on the house.
I'm not sure that you have tom provide him with acess to the child, especially when he only wants to show off his trophy. Remind him that he has a legal duty to pay maintenance for his child, for her sake, not yours. Why should his parents expect a visit from her ? And if his parents know, how does his current mistress not know ?
Though it is usually good for a child to have a relationship with the father, this is NOT so when the father is a bad person and/or when it's a fragmented relationship, on-again, off-again.
You are not being a bad parent - HE is.
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