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Question
Posted by: noname | 2011-08-20

what stops me from killing myself?

this morning the whole day alone ahead of me i was in bed thinking how to remove razor blades to cut my wrists....then how about gassing me in my car...taking tablets

but i couldnt - never have been able to - never even tried 1ce ...think of it constantly tho....

what stops me? what is the difference CS between those that do and those that don''t - i think of gassing the i think to long before he or his kids come home so they''ll not find me in time to save me....

how do they take that final step....what force is it that makes them take it that i don''t have ?

Fear? cowardice?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I am so sorry to hear that you feel so bad, but I'm pleased to hear you have not yet taken steps to damage or harm yourself. YOu seem to be seeking an explanation for why you have thus far had the excellent sense not to do so. More important, perhaps, would be finding reasons why you have been thinking so much about doing so, how you have come to assume you should consider doing so. If you are unhappy, working properly and sincerely with a good shrink, you can work your way out of the unhappiness, which otherwise may have become a habit, as false a way of routinely viewing the world as a happy clappy person habitually views the world in an unrealistically sunny way. If you are depressed, that depression can be lifted.
Instead of focussing all your creativity, thinking powers and efforts on nagative thoughts, if you devoted those strengths to finding positive solutions, you could achieve those.
Remember that suicide or even less major self-harm can be and usually is, extremely hurtful and damaging to friends and family, and nakes their lives sadder and more fraught.
And never forget that all too often, plans for suicide or self-harm, however ingenious, and however much they might seem, often leaves the person still alive, but more seriously damaged, less able to sort out what needs to be sorted out, with all the problems they previously had, plus a host of new ones.
Please, do get the help you so obviously need and deserve.
Depression is the sneakiest of illnesses, which often starts by robbing you of perspective, by stealing your capacity to hope, even to believe that things could indeed be better. Don't let the twisted chemistry of an illness cheat you and your loved ones. Get help. and let us know on the forum of your progress.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

4
Our users say:
Posted by: Mary | 2011-08-22

Hi there

You know i was on the brink of this myself about a year ago. i really meant it. I had a very nasty person write in and say cry me a river. It made me feel worse. We can all offer comfort but that does not make a bad relationship better, does not give you money when you do not have it, pay off debts, get you a new job, help you lose 20kg instantly BUT what I can say is that I realise now what a waste of my life it would have been. Yes, I am on anti-depressants. No I do not have lots of money I still battle like mad in fact. I am just so glad that I did not kill myself because there is a tomorrow bleak as what things are now. My own father killed himself and you hurt the people you leave behind actually - ones you never knew cared to much. So I have had first hand experience of this and also of how it personally feels. Your feelings are so very real but if you could get yourself down to a GP and manage to get some anti-depressants prescribed you will feel so much better. It just helps you see things as they really are and what you can do about it (baby steps). You need to be kind to yourself and be your own best friend first. What would you say to someone else in your position? I sat there and asked myself this. And I had some answers - I put my suicide on hold for a moment and decided to save myself. Things are not 100% but I got rid of an emotionally abusive man (something I never thought I could do or live through) and I take baby steps daily. Try to see that you and your life are both very much.
xxxx

Reply to Mary
Posted by: Maria | 2011-08-21

Perhaps what stops you is the will to live, even if it''s flickering like a candle in the wind. Don''t let that little flame die. Suicide is a permanent solution to temporary problems. It might not feel that way to you now, but you can be helped and you deserve it. You sound very depressed. Depression is an illness, and it can be treated. It robs you of joy in your life, excitement over the future, and the ability to think and plan your life in a positive way. Ask for help, it is more than ok to do so and you are not weak or stupid or whatever else the depression is telling you.

Call Lifeline: 0861 322 322 or Depression and Anxiety Group helpline: 8am-8pm (011) 262-6396, go and see your GP or make an appointment with a psychologist. There are different ways of getting help. It is difficult to make that call, and you probably fear that people won''t take you seriously and will just tell you to pull yourself together. From personal experience I can tell you that they won''t do that.

Take care.

Reply to Maria
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-08-21

I am so sorry to hear that you feel so bad, but I'm pleased to hear you have not yet taken steps to damage or harm yourself. YOu seem to be seeking an explanation for why you have thus far had the excellent sense not to do so. More important, perhaps, would be finding reasons why you have been thinking so much about doing so, how you have come to assume you should consider doing so. If you are unhappy, working properly and sincerely with a good shrink, you can work your way out of the unhappiness, which otherwise may have become a habit, as false a way of routinely viewing the world as a happy clappy person habitually views the world in an unrealistically sunny way. If you are depressed, that depression can be lifted.
Instead of focussing all your creativity, thinking powers and efforts on nagative thoughts, if you devoted those strengths to finding positive solutions, you could achieve those.
Remember that suicide or even less major self-harm can be and usually is, extremely hurtful and damaging to friends and family, and nakes their lives sadder and more fraught.
And never forget that all too often, plans for suicide or self-harm, however ingenious, and however much they might seem, often leaves the person still alive, but more seriously damaged, less able to sort out what needs to be sorted out, with all the problems they previously had, plus a host of new ones.
Please, do get the help you so obviously need and deserve.
Depression is the sneakiest of illnesses, which often starts by robbing you of perspective, by stealing your capacity to hope, even to believe that things could indeed be better. Don't let the twisted chemistry of an illness cheat you and your loved ones. Get help. and let us know on the forum of your progress.

Reply to cybershrink
Posted by: B | 2011-08-20

Don''t do it, you''re here for a very good reason, you need to learn in this life. Even if almost unbearable!
Completing your life here is hugely important for you as a soul. And that doesn''t even come close to describing the importance.yes, it does not seem this way for you now.

You''re going to be very very regretfull if you do commit, in fact the sadness you''ll experience will be huge! Rather try go see someone professional, as your body/mind may be ''ill''. Go see a Doc! Don''t wait! I know what you are going through. Get better soon

Reply to B

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