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Question
Posted by: Anonomous | 2012/05/18

What is wrong with me

Good day Cybershrink. I would like your thoughts on my behavior and personality as such. I am a 32 year old female and have a problem that has been going on for as long as i can remember. I am extremely sensitive to everything, i have been like this since being a child. I have been diagnosed with depression a few years ago, as well as an hormonal imbalance which requires medication. Besides all of the medical issues i notice that most of my feelings are triggered by what other people feel, do and say.I have been to several therapists and have done some cognitive work where sometimes it works, sometimes it does not. I care about nearly everything in the world, have extreme and sometimes heart wrenching views on every topic at times. I am in a working envirmoment and in an attempt to get " along"  with people including my own family over the years i have tried to keep some of my feelings in. My husband understands the part where i care about injustices and i talk to him sometimes. So many things upset me, what is my sensitive trigger. I came across a temperament called " the highly sensitive person which was discovered by Elain Aaron. It explains many things but not the fact that i get so easily offended and feel heavy about things until i have expressed it. Im sitting at work right now angry and hurt because a colleage accidently did a task that was assigned to me. My mind is driving me mad. Please help me.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I'm not so sure about the "hormonal imbalance" diagnosis, which, unless made by a specialist Endocrinoligist ( a hormone specialist ) I doubt - it gets made too easily, and too often wrongly, by GPs. And without the best expert guidance, adding hormones to treatment of a badly diagnosed condition, can in itself mess up one's mood and make one feel hypersensitive to getting unhelpfully upset.
Cognitive work, if by that you mean psychotherapy in the Cognitive-Behaviour Thwerapy, CBT style, ought to be really helpful, and if sometimes it seems less so, its more likely to be because its not being done well enough or tried hard enough.
Try to focus your caring better - you can be effective in making small but useful changes in direct local matters where you have influence ; don't blame yourself for the Greek Financial mess or the crisis of the Euro - nothing you did caused those situations, and nothing you could do would improve them. That is the task of others, who are much more directly responsible. "Caring" about problems over which you have no control, is useless to those affected by the problems, and harmlful for you.
Only a good CBT therapist working closely with you, can identify your various triggers, and help you learn to desensitize them.
That some people are more higly sensitive has been recognized for decades and longer, and nevr discovered by Elain Aaron - don't mistake what someone labels a condition in order to sell a book, with an actual useful discovery. And that sort of "discovery" may descibe rather than explain, an actually well-recognized situation, without necessarily contributing usefully to its solution.
Review how unnecessary and unhelpful your wrath or horror at such situations really is. SO a colleague accidentally did a task that had been assigned to you. Does that have to be a disaster ? Do something else, now you have some extra time.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/05/19

I'm not so sure about the "hormonal imbalance" diagnosis, which, unless made by a specialist Endocrinoligist ( a hormone specialist ) I doubt - it gets made too easily, and too often wrongly, by GPs. And without the best expert guidance, adding hormones to treatment of a badly diagnosed condition, can in itself mess up one's mood and make one feel hypersensitive to getting unhelpfully upset.
Cognitive work, if by that you mean psychotherapy in the Cognitive-Behaviour Thwerapy, CBT style, ought to be really helpful, and if sometimes it seems less so, its more likely to be because its not being done well enough or tried hard enough.
Try to focus your caring better - you can be effective in making small but useful changes in direct local matters where you have influence ; don't blame yourself for the Greek Financial mess or the crisis of the Euro - nothing you did caused those situations, and nothing you could do would improve them. That is the task of others, who are much more directly responsible. "Caring" about problems over which you have no control, is useless to those affected by the problems, and harmlful for you.
Only a good CBT therapist working closely with you, can identify your various triggers, and help you learn to desensitize them.
That some people are more higly sensitive has been recognized for decades and longer, and nevr discovered by Elain Aaron - don't mistake what someone labels a condition in order to sell a book, with an actual useful discovery. And that sort of "discovery" may descibe rather than explain, an actually well-recognized situation, without necessarily contributing usefully to its solution.
Review how unnecessary and unhelpful your wrath or horror at such situations really is. SO a colleague accidentally did a task that had been assigned to you. Does that have to be a disaster ? Do something else, now you have some extra time.

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