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Question
Posted by: 100% Woman | 2010-03-31

What do you think?

My husband and I have been married for 8 years. We''ve had a weird sexual relationship in the fact that I''m extremely sexual and he''s happy with it once a month or two. So we only do it once a month or two... Which I''m not happy about, but I don''t want to pressure him. We''ve talked about it, but he''s just not a sexual person.
The weird thing is the last couple of months, he doesn''t want me to please him orally. He used to love it before, but now says that he prefers not to because men can give men -|- s, but he can only have sex with me (woman) in the vagina...
This seems so weid to me, what do you think?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

A healthy sexual relationship should aim to satisfy both parties. If you just continue the way it is now you are taking a risk of developing an under tone of resentment or infidelity and that will in any case be destructive to the sexual relationship.

By the sound of it you could benefit from consulting with a psychologist that works specifically with sexual concerns and couple counseling, and there are areas that need exploring and attempting to do it on your own, mind be challenge.

You are welcome to phone our helpline – 0860100262 where you could be assisted in finding a practitioner as close as possible to you.

Furthermore you are welcome to visit the following website for any more sexual health information and assignments that could be helpful: www.sexualhealth.co.za

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: anon | 2010-04-06

I dont beleive its ever time to run, maby he just experimented with a guy, and is feeling guilty, accept him and tell him to talk about it, and that you would be understanding and forgiving, also get some toys and take your sex to a new level. If he did experiment with guy, thats probably all it was, so all move on from that, it would be best for all, never throw away why you first married, start dating again,playing games,using toys and be naughty.

Reply to anon
Posted by: Top cat | 2010-04-01

It is time to run, your hubby sounds gay. A man never say no for a bj or sex.

Reply to Top cat
Posted by: Anon | 2010-03-31

not sure what he means, maybe he has tried it with a man. I experimented with a few men many years ago, and I must admit they gave the best oral ever, better than most women I have had.

Reply to Anon
Posted by: KK | 2010-03-31

He is definately gay but in denial. Why would he talk about it that way when he loved it before. Even the fact that you have to settle for once a month even if your game is weird. It''s like he''s forcing himself!

Reply to KK
Posted by: Nice Guy | 2010-03-31

My personal tke in this, again personal take!!!

He just had sex with gays and he is so shocked that he wishes to change the past and also traumatised but telling you is not gonna be easy therefore he tries to give you hints so you can guess or ask which he feels might make s it the burden of telling you a little more easier. just watch out for the signs , then i doubt if you will be fine.

Reply to Nice Guy
Posted by: Casper | 2010-03-31

Sounds very weirs, especially the part of him thimking about men giving men blow jobs, maybe he walked the path of wonder.

I wish my wife would give me oral pleasure or even more sex than once a month, we spoke about it and it ended in a huge ugly fight, she then accused me of just telling her what she does not do, that I am perhaps cheating cause I just complain about no sex, or no oral sex etc.

Reply to Casper
Posted by: sexologist | 2010-03-31

A healthy sexual relationship should aim to satisfy both parties. If you just continue the way it is now you are taking a risk of developing an under tone of resentment or infidelity and that will in any case be destructive to the sexual relationship.

By the sound of it you could benefit from consulting with a psychologist that works specifically with sexual concerns and couple counseling, and there are areas that need exploring and attempting to do it on your own, mind be challenge.

You are welcome to phone our helpline – 0860100262 where you could be assisted in finding a practitioner as close as possible to you.

Furthermore you are welcome to visit the following website for any more sexual health information and assignments that could be helpful: www.sexualhealth.co.za

Reply to sexologist

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