Posted by: Anon | 2013-01-10

Weight and orgasm

Dear Doc, I have been married for 15 years with a healthy sex life. My husband gained about 20 kg the past year and is currently using meds for high blood pressure. That too has not been too much of a problem. Lately, when I am on top of him, as this is the only way I can reach an orgasm, he often becomes limp resulting in not being able for me to reach an orgasm. When we change positions, he becomes hard and he is able to orgasm, except me. Could it be that his tummy be too big and I am cutting off the blood circulation by being on top? I am really worried. This has now become a problem for us, so much so, that we don''t want to be intimate in fear of disappointment.

Thank you

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Our expert says:
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By the sound of it you need to find a way that works for both of you. It could that he is not feeling in control with you on top and or that the blood flow is limited. Many women also manage to reach orgasm when they have clitoral stimulation simultaniously with penetration. Maybe if you explore that during a position that works for him it could help. Otherwise it could be helpful to seek the professional guidance from a psychologist that could guide you both in addressing the concerns and looking at different options.

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Our users say:
Posted by: XXX | 2013-01-10

I suspect the meds could be causing a weaker erection,however,whenever he has " control " by being on top, he has a stronger one.
Being overweight can surely also be a problem with a man''s erection.I would encourage him to lose weight.
Can you not have more foreplay bringing you closer to orgasm,so by the time you get on top it is not long before you cum.You can then change positions to enable him to orgasm.

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