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Question
Posted by: Chelsea | 2009-11-26

wedding postponed because of he' s sister?

Hi am a 28 year old female. I have been with the man that I know I am going to marry for over a year and a half now (I now this may seem short for those reading this, but we have known eachother since childhood.

We have discussed getting married (especially because we want children, and I am not getting any younger)... so I wanted us to get married sometime next year, so that we can plan for children the following year.

BUT... Due to the fact that he' s sister is getting married at the END of next year, he does not want to marry me until after that (sometime in 2011).
This puts me in an awkward position because I can' t see why we cannot get married before her. Am I being selfish wanting to fit in a wedding next year? I feel so sad about this (and have discussed my needs with him), I do not want to have children in my mid-30' s...
Am I being selfish or is he putting he' s sister before us?
I am so unhappy about this I feel like falling pregnant and running away... I feel so ready to have a baby!

Please advise

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Have you discussed these details with him ? Why does he see his sister's marriage ( where there may be less good reason for urgency ) as taking precedence automatically over his own ? You're not being selfish, but perhaps practical.

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Maria | 2009-11-26

It sounds as if he is not ready to commit yet, and he is using this extremely lame excuse to get out of marrying you. Please don' t let your desire to have a baby cloud your thinking - many women these days have their first babies while in their thirties. Rather take a good long look at your relationship and think about whether you really want to spend the rest of your life with this guy, or if you should cut your losses and move on.

Reply to Maria
Posted by: cybershrink | 2009-11-26

Have you discussed these details with him ? Why does he see his sister's marriage ( where there may be less good reason for urgency ) as taking precedence automatically over his own ? You're not being selfish, but perhaps practical.

Reply to cybershrink

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