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Question
Posted by: Bride-to-be | 2008/06/18

Wedding dilemma

Hi

I recently got engaged at the age of 27. My fiance and I have been dating for over 4 years and all I wanted was to get married. What I thought would be the most happiest time of my life, is turning out to be completely the opposite!

My fiance says I've gone and complicated life now because all of a sudden there's just so much pressure. His mother has already booked the venue, booked the dj and said that she'll bake the cake, all this without our imput. My fiance told his mom to take a step back and that she's rushing things a bit and that we would first like to discuss it between us, but it's just getting worse. The problem is that we're accepting money from both our families to make the big day possible, but they now think that they can call the shots because of their money contribution.

I have dreamt of this day all my life and surely everything is up to us as a couple. I've told my fiance that we should decide on everything and only after that should we involve our parents. His parents have now said that they will pay for the whole wedding on condition that we have it at the venue they've chosen, go with the menu that they've chosen and can invite all the friends they want. This really aggrivates me because I'd like to be the one to make the decisions. I now feel like telling them that their money is not needed, that we'll do it on our own, but doing it this way will take so much longer to get married, because it will take a long time for us to save on our combined salaries, but I can't see another way.

How do I handle this matter without causing fireworks? Already my fiance and I are at each other's throats. Please help!!!

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Maria | 2008/06/18

Have a small wedding, whatever you can afford. You can always have a big party in five years time once you have more finances available. Getting married is NOT primarily about "the big day", it's about wanting to share your life with someone for ever after.

Reply to Maria
Posted by: ET | 2008/06/18

HI GIRL,IT SEEMS THAT YOUR FIANCE WANT TO CALL OF THE WEDDING THING.TALK TO HIM AND ABOUT IT AND FINALLY BOTH YOU WILL GET THE SOLLUTION OR MAYBE HE DOENST WANT TO GET MARRIED ANYMORE.GOOD LUCK.

Reply to ET

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