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Question
Posted by: RVD | 2012/05/06

We text 24/7, but when we meet, it''s so awkward.

We text every day for the past month (sometimes up to 3hours at a time), but when we I see her, it''s so awkward for me.I don''t know what to say. Why? I''m 43 (divorced) and she is 30 (never married)  both single and we teach at the same school.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I think the easy availability of testing has actually reduced access to real genuine human communication, and makes it too easy for people to avoid learning actual human communication skills ( and to miss the joys of real communication). Testing is fine for sending short messages like : "Finished shopping early - can you fetch me at 2.3o ?", but not for real communicating with someone else, let alone someone you actually like and who hopefully likes you. Its like the pretense that Facebook "friends' have anything at all to do with actual Friendship.
Maybe you're noth just a but rusty on conversation skills, and a bit nervous when together ; one can get hung up about struggling to find the "right" thing to say, to the point of finding it hard to think of ANYTHING to say, rather than just relaxing and chatting. A counsellor can help each of you to learn these skills and confidence, and to enjoy a genuine relationship rather than a textual substitute for one

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

2
Our users say:
Posted by: Jenna | 2012/05/07

You stop texting. How are you suppose to have a conversation when you see her if you''ve told her everything via SMS?

Reply to Jenna
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/05/06

I think the easy availability of testing has actually reduced access to real genuine human communication, and makes it too easy for people to avoid learning actual human communication skills ( and to miss the joys of real communication). Testing is fine for sending short messages like : "Finished shopping early - can you fetch me at 2.3o ?", but not for real communicating with someone else, let alone someone you actually like and who hopefully likes you. Its like the pretense that Facebook "friends' have anything at all to do with actual Friendship.
Maybe you're noth just a but rusty on conversation skills, and a bit nervous when together ; one can get hung up about struggling to find the "right" thing to say, to the point of finding it hard to think of ANYTHING to say, rather than just relaxing and chatting. A counsellor can help each of you to learn these skills and confidence, and to enjoy a genuine relationship rather than a textual substitute for one

Reply to cybershrink

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