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Question
Posted by: Bobo | 2010/01/08

Was i wrong to fall in love?

I fell in love with a man,i didn' t know he was married then divorced as he didn' t tell me,he kept that secret for a year. He has two kids in his marriage and others 3 with different mothers as well,but he said he no longer in love with all these people, i do not have kids, he is 15 yrs older than me. Im not happy at all but i love him, he is very much secretive as the results, i found out he is got a small kid(1yr), he didn' t tell me, i just saw a slip from Makro,when he bought his grocerries and " Pampers and Nan No2" , i was so shocked, i asked him, he said he was afraid to tell me, is this man safe? Even now he can not tell me how many kids he has. The biggest problem those moms are keep on calling often and again must go them to visit to their moms house, i just ask myself, am i safe? But i still love the man.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Falling in love is usually natural, bu falling in love with the wrong person , for the wrong reasons, can be a disaster. You know this guy is a liar and seems to have had broken and unhappy relationships with several women and fathered a number of kids he surely is not fathering well.
Of course he's not safe for an emotional investment, or any other kind.
There's not much in this guy worth loving - I suspect you are more in love with the idea of being in love

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5
Our users say:
Posted by: brenda | 2010/01/11

That diot is using women,and for the fact that he is a divorcee, there is something really went wrong between him and so called wife, he is the source and the cause of the divorce because of his unfaithfullness and betrayal to his wife and family,now he tries to release his devorce depression and stress by using women and even YOU!That womeniser won' t settle with any one of you, he doesn' t have Love at all,he will maintain his many kids untill he dies, as long as he can' t keep his zip closed,and HIV is arround a corner or even already has,who knows? He is sleeping arround with every Dick ,Tom and Harry,he is not worth the word Love. Sister go find somebody worth your trully loving and caring, you still very young ,you need someone at your age,who will grow with you building up your happy and young healthy family,than to be torchered by all these mothers of his kids busy calling so called " the father of the kids."  It is a pitty that you love him so much as said,but Get a life young sister! Don' t stress!Good luck for your future!

Reply to brenda
Posted by: Whena | 2010/01/08

The reason taht you have fallen for him is that he is so practised in the art of seducing woman.

I say leave this idiot and go and find somebody worth your love and attention

Reply to Whena
Posted by: Whena | 2010/01/08

You were not wrong to fall in love , but were wrong to fall in love with this idiot.
Can you imagine a future with him-always thinking is he now cheating on me with somebody else? He will never be able to properly provide for you as he will be too busy paying maintenance for all his children.Do you want to go through life defending him and his actions from the mothers of all his children? (that is to say if he does act responsibly towards his many children)

Reply to Whena
Posted by: Me | 2010/01/08

Imagine what else he is not telling you...

Reply to Me
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010/01/08

Falling in love is usually natural, bu falling in love with the wrong person , for the wrong reasons, can be a disaster. You know this guy is a liar and seems to have had broken and unhappy relationships with several women and fathered a number of kids he surely is not fathering well.
Of course he's not safe for an emotional investment, or any other kind.
There's not much in this guy worth loving - I suspect you are more in love with the idea of being in love

Reply to cybershrink

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