Our expert says:
Have a calm discussion with your kids, about how proud you are of how well behaved and well brought up they are, in contrast to this pair of spoiled and clumsy kids, and encourage them to behave in the way you have always done. And support them that this couple of little monsters sound jealous of how well-behaved your kids are, so resort to clumsy and crude sniping.
The mother is not entirely a "dear soul" if she has brought up her kids to behave badly and cruelly, and if she doesn't notice this. Gently break it to her that they are cruel to your daughters and clumsy in company. Tell her that while you enjoy meeting her, the behaviour of her daughters makes these encounters much less pleasant than they could be. Ask if you can help her to bring it home to hwer daughters how they should behave towards others.
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