Our expert says:
When he cancelled the couselling before marriage that was a bad and ominous sign, and as you now know, that would have been the right time to call it all off. It does indeed sound as though he is verbally abusive, and unlikely to sincerely attempt marriage counselling, as he probably wouldn't want to face some of the ugly facts about himself.
Maybe you need to talk instead to a lawyer, and to a group like POWA which help abused women to plan a safe exit.
As for Sameshoes, its tragic to hear of a therpist foolish enough to be "lenient" on an abuser. Maybe he thinks he needs to be cautious to at least keep the abuser within counselling ?
A for the appropriate concerns for the kids - it is of NO value to children to be raised with an abusive parent, even if the abuse if directed towards the other parent rather than them.
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