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Posted by: Realist | 2011/02/28

Update:I went through my girlfriends diary

Yep like I said, her diary was going too be my novel and quite honestly this is more difficult thanI thought and I''m not sure whether to carry on with my so called slow exit strategy.

So ja Friends,its been a weekend and as usual, she came to my place all excited and bubbly.It hurt me to look at her and remember all the things I read. Can you believe it, she asked me when am I bringing my daughter for a visit as she would not mind giving me space.I figured, the bit*h probably wants some space to go f*ck arnd. I said next weekend.She did pick up that I was not myself and enquired and I just said I had a bad day at work. Well on Sunday, she went to church and told me she was going to the baby shower afterwards and I said ok and oh...according to the diary she wrote something about looking foward to spending some time with this other guy so I guess that was it.I spent most of my time with my guys cz I went to the stadium on Sat and came back late and eish, I dont think I can bring myslf to have sex with her after all this.But still, I don''t regret reading her diary and I m somehow going to deal with but it just has to be soon . I cant believe that at one point she actually said she wants to get to know my better and I fell for it.
She came back at arnd abt 9 in the evening and told me how fun it was at the bbyshower " Lol" . Some of you think that my approach to this situation is immature and unstable but its not so. You see, I''m gonna curl over and succumb but I want to be very practical and handle this situation carefully. The honest truth is that noe that I have had more time to think about this, its beginning to hurt, contrary to what I wrote on Friday. I realized that at the end of the day this is the heart that we talking about.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

If you'll check back throuh the archives of this column,you'll see how often variations on this problem turn up. People who sneak a peek into someone else's diary or phone or computer often have some good reason to be suspicious, and often find something alarming - which they can only discuss by revealing that they have been sneaky, and with the risk that the argument becomes all about their sneaking and not about the most important issues.
Now, with this latest instalment of your saga, one still wonders why, knowing what you now know, you choose to stay with her. We said it would hurt, didn't we ?
I didn't know that babyshowers lasted until 9 pm - that's one insomniac baby !


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Our users say:
Posted by: Beast | 2011/03/01

Or maybe she deliberate wrote anything in her diary and hoped that you will read it, to see whether she can trust you.

And then you did read the diary so eventualy she will be no more part of you. just maybe i don''t say it is but anything is possible, if it was my diary i would have hidden it quite far away.

i think she is testing you.

Reply to Beast
Posted by: Realist | 2011/02/28

To CS, I didn''t choose to stay with her. I knew the moment I read the diary that it was over. The thought of confronting her there and there did cross my mind but I thought that wouldn''t have much effect esp on her. The honest truth is that right now as we speak, my heart if full of o much anger and frustration.You know when a wound is still fresh, it doesn''t hurt as much bt the pain becomes more severe over time.I have so many evil I deas going thru my mind bt dont worry, I wont do anything stupid and ja, you did tell me it would hurt.
Woman, you right,eventually I will have to confront her but the diffeence is I want to use a different approach that will surprize her even. As for the lesson learnt,its something that we all know that somepeople are deceitfull...and NO its not that I shouldn''t have gone through her diary coz had I not, I''d still be a fool.

Reply to Realist
Posted by: Woman | 2011/02/28

My advice still stands - tell her honestly how you felt when you got to know the " real"  her and tell her it''s over. The pain goes away. But was the lesson is learnt?

Reply to Woman
Posted by: jake | 2011/02/28

so sad to hear what u going throught : (

Reply to jake
Posted by: Chris758 | 2011/02/28

I am sorry for you and know exactly how you feel at the moment and how you felt over the weekend. TRUST is a very big thing in any relationship and when that is broken it can take years to heal!!

The bad thing is , if I am corrct, is making love to her again. For me it was a case of thinking, an dactually feeling disgusted thinking that another man''s penis was inside her and I just couldn''t get myself to do it again!!

This is a sad situation for you and I always say that it is unbelievable how close love and hate is to each other!! Ther is a very thin line between them!!!

best of luck to you but go for counceling, it will help you a lot!!

Reply to Chris758
Posted by: Lolo | 2011/02/28

Ke sorry ntate ke tshepa o ka se nagane gore all girl ba yalo.......
You will find LETHABO 1day stru!

Reply to Lolo
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/02/28

If you'll check back throuh the archives of this column,you'll see how often variations on this problem turn up. People who sneak a peek into someone else's diary or phone or computer often have some good reason to be suspicious, and often find something alarming - which they can only discuss by revealing that they have been sneaky, and with the risk that the argument becomes all about their sneaking and not about the most important issues.
Now, with this latest instalment of your saga, one still wonders why, knowing what you now know, you choose to stay with her. We said it would hurt, didn't we ?
I didn't know that babyshowers lasted until 9 pm - that's one insomniac baby !


Reply to cybershrink

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