Home > Experts > Question Search health advice Find an answer Question Posted by: Annie | 2012/06/28 Q.unwanted advise So I have told my best friend I am pregnant again. Immediately she starts advising me on breastfeeding....She has 2 kids one she breastfed less than a week and the second for 8 weeks. I breastfed my first for 11 months.Why does she think I need advise???Seems to me something about being pregnant makes people think we are uncapable to think for ourselves? 9 Pin It user comments Posted by: From a Mother too | 2012/06/28 I am sorry that you can''t share this with any of your friends. It would help your grieving process a great deal. When your baby is born, and you feel a bit sad, and then tell people that you expected twins in the beginning, they might not understand why you feel the way you do. Not all friends are the same, and its sometimes the ones you least expect, that understand you and your situation the best. Best of luck and take care of yourself. Reply to From a Mother too Posted by: Annie | 2012/06/28 Perhaps you all are right.From a Mother to - I read your post over and over woundering about what " loss" you were refering too.... then I realised the twin - nobody knows it was twins. I want to tell someone, but I haven''t decided whom. The people I told about my mc long ago was so insencitive that I wished I''d never told them. This includes my mom. I dont know who to share this with. So for now I am keeping it for myself and sharing only on this site where I am a faceless internet name. Reply to Annie Posted by: From a Mother too | 2012/06/28 I agree with Observer. You are way too sensitive. What would you have done if she had said " Oh cool" and nothing further. Maybe it was just her way of making conversation and avoiding the topic of your loss and actually being happy and enthusiastic about your pregnancy. With both my pregnancies, I got advice from everyone and everywhere, and it didn''t bother me (even with my second pregnancy) because even after a child, you still don''t know everything and children are so very different. So rather than be annoyed with her, be grateful that you have a friend in your life who is there for you and loves you even if she sometimes gives " unwanted" advice. You have probably in the course of your friendship given her some unwanted advice as well, but she''s still your friend. Breathe and relax, its not worth getting worked up over. Reply to From a Mother too Posted by: JT | 2012/06/28 I am with observer on this one.Pregnancy comes with alot of unwanted advice.I am always being told to dress warmer even by those who do not have children. I just smile and walk on. Reply to JT Posted by: anon | 2012/06/28 I think your best friend is tiny bit jealous that you''re pregnant.The same happened to me when ppl found out i''m preg. It''s only gonna get worse as the pregnancy progresses. Reply to anon Posted by: Annie | 2012/06/28 You know what, I expected this kind of behavior.... but not from my best friend and especially not on breastfeeding. And not again after our first conversation on it.I sommer feel like telling her I am not planning on breastfeeding again.BUT - I stay the nice girl and keep it to myself. Make all the right noises and here and there tell her I remember and remind her I did it for 11 months (not even long ago)I think most women love being pregnant and talking about it. Thats why we get all the advise. Still, they should all remember how they felt while receiving all the advise! Reply to Annie Posted by: Sunshine | 2012/06/28 Yip ,we all get that ...it comes to a point that you want to pull the hair out your head because of sheer frustration.Then you will realize that they''ll continue to give you unwanted advice anyways,so what i learnt with my first preggy that i just turn the music on in my head and turn my ears off and occassional just nod. Or even better yet just avoid those people. Reply to Sunshine Posted by: Observer | 2012/06/28 You guys are too emotional. why cant you accept that people are happy for you. its normal for people to throw in advise there and there and that does not mean you dont know.havent you heard of Word of mouth?stop thinking negative. take it positively. you live in a world that has people who think differently and you can listen but no need to act.otherwise stop telling your " friends that you are pregnant" then you wont hear advises from them.this is boring. many people will pass comments and complements wheather you like them or not its your problems. just swallow and s h i t it or use it in your system. Reply to Observer Posted by: Amy | 2012/06/28 I so agree. I just had a toasted sarmie with chips and been informed by one of my colleagues that I should stop eating junkfood and think of my unborn.Guess what, next I''m going to grab the Scotch and pour myself a double on the rocks!! And light a cigar while I''m at it. No, even better, ek gaan graptwak koop!Geeeeee whizz, what is this? Reply to Amy Want to comment? Your name (optional) Your comment To prevent spam please solve this simple math problem: × Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly. × Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly. Reply to Your name (optional) Your comment To prevent spam please solve this simple math problem: advertisement From our sponsors Hill's Science Plan Canine Mini range What is Diabetic Neuropathy? There are more than 200 different viruses which can cause a cold A clinically proven skin care range is now available