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Question
Posted by: Worried | 2009/12/14

unsatisfied

Hi

I have a problem with my girlfriend of 5yrs,every time we have sex I come too soon.I have had sex with other people whilst in a relationship with her and I never experience this problem.It' s only with her that this happens.Why????

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

Clearly there are two issues here:
(1) your difficulty delaying ejaculation
(2) the fact that you have slept with others
I will address both:
(1) from your comments to other peoples' replies I see that you feel unsure of yourself. I am wondering therefore how confident you are about your knowlege of your body and how it works...whilst it 'works' with other women, is that because you are doing something to delay ejaculation with them, or do you just last longer because you are not as excited? Men have to use delay strategies to let their excitement subside before they can continue - do a search on this site for previous more detailed responses to delaying orgasm, this topic has been discussed many times.
(2) My issue with your sleeping with other women is twofold. Firstly I want to encourage you to think through the 'safe sex' principles here and ensure that you are not putting your 'very exciting' girlfriend at risk of an STI. Secondly, in our society you are seriously jeopardising the relationship because many people struggle to overcome betrayals. Think very carefully about the implications of your actions not only for yourself, but also for this girlfriend that you find so exciting.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

10
Our users say:
Posted by: Lady man | 2009/12/15

Worried

It does not matter what you say. You already admit to cheating on your girlfriend. Do not try to changed the subject.
Have you ever try to talk to her about it. To see what she will suggest to solve your problem.

Reply to Lady man
Posted by: worried | 2009/12/15

I don' t think you all understand my point here,what I' m trying to say is with her I become too excited that' s why I come soon.....

Reply to worried
Posted by: Lady man | 2009/12/15

Worried

I said it before treat your WOMAN the way you want to be treaded. If you tread your woman in the right manner you will be surprise in the end what she will be willing to do for you.

I just remember to say something if you continue to tread her the way your are then you are not a REAL man.

Reply to Lady man
Posted by: A man | 2009/12/15

I agree with Lady man, she deserves someone else not someone who is so insecure he has to sleep around to prove his manhood.....please leave her and let her fins someone deserving.

Reply to A man
Posted by: Lady man | 2009/12/15

Worries

I will say you are useless for thinking that your girlfriend is not good enough that is way you sleep with other people. You do not prove anything only that you are not good enough for your girlfriend. I also think she needs someone else.

Reply to Lady man
Posted by: Sexologist | 2009/12/15

Clearly there are two issues here:
(1) your difficulty delaying ejaculation
(2) the fact that you have slept with others
I will address both:
(1) from your comments to other peoples' replies I see that you feel unsure of yourself. I am wondering therefore how confident you are about your knowlege of your body and how it works...whilst it 'works' with other women, is that because you are doing something to delay ejaculation with them, or do you just last longer because you are not as excited? Men have to use delay strategies to let their excitement subside before they can continue - do a search on this site for previous more detailed responses to delaying orgasm, this topic has been discussed many times.
(2) My issue with your sleeping with other women is twofold. Firstly I want to encourage you to think through the 'safe sex' principles here and ensure that you are not putting your 'very exciting' girlfriend at risk of an STI. Secondly, in our society you are seriously jeopardising the relationship because many people struggle to overcome betrayals. Think very carefully about the implications of your actions not only for yourself, but also for this girlfriend that you find so exciting.

Reply to Sexologist
Posted by: worried | 2009/12/14

I love my girlfriend and I would like to satisfy her,it' s just that.......she makes me want to come soon,hence I slept around just to prove to myself that I am not useless in bed,but thre is just something about her

Reply to worried
Posted by: Egg | 2009/12/14

Your feeling guilty because you are sleeping around.

Reply to Egg
Posted by: XXX | 2009/12/14

You are probably too " caught up in the moment" ,just try and relax and have more foreplay.There are certain sprays that you cn use to help delay orgasm ie Stud 100,try them until you get your rhythm back.

Reply to XXX
Posted by: anon | 2009/12/14

why do you stay with your GF? You dont love her. Leave her and let her find someone who cares about her, you are just using her.

Reply to anon

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