advertisement
Question
Posted by: Seth | 2011/08/16

Unprotected gay sex

Hi Sexologist,

I''m gay and my boyfriend and I have recently had unprotected anal sex. We''re in a loving and trusting monogamous relationship and I think that the unprotected sex situation proved that we are both committed.

I know he is responsible and he was safe in his previous relationships. He, however, was my first sexual partner.

I don''t know how to go about asking if we can go get tested together just to confirm that we''re both safe and then take the committment further from there. I''d rather be safe than sorry... we''ll, we''ve already done the deed so to speak. But i trust him. Any ideas?

One last thing... i''ve done research on HIV/AIDS, and I''m just a bit confused by the transmission thereof. Yes, we''ve all heard the ads on TV and stuff, but I''ve still got a question. I know HIV/AIDS is spread mainly through blood and anal sex or bodily fluids, but does this include sperm? And why is anal sex more dangerous for infection?

Thank you so much. I really would appreciate any advice.
Regards
Seth

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

Dear Seth,

There is no recipe approach I can offer you with regards to how best to approach your partner to request that you both have the HIV test as a concrete basis on which to navigate your sexual relationship furtehr. I can only advise that you be honest and heartfelt in your request to him that the two of you do this. Just as you experience concern for him in making such a request, you too can have the expectation that he too will respect your need in this matter. You are making a very reasonable and responsible request as a mature sexually active adult in respect and care for your partner, yourself and your relationship.

With regards your second question. The HIV is found in blood, sperm, vaginal lubrication and breast milk. The anus has a large blood supply that is also very close to the surface of the skin. The fact that anal sex requires good knowledge of how the sphincter works, the use of lubrication and condoms and taking things gently too start are important factors in anal sex. If the penetrating partner does not use sufficient lube, does not take things slowly too start, does not use a condom, allowing the anal sphincter to relax sufficiently to accommodate the penis, the chance for tearing and injury is high in an area with a high and superficial blood supply.

This resulting in a high risk for sperm getting into contact with the blood supply of the recipient of anal sex.

Regards

Sexologist

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

9
Our users say:
Posted by: Another | 2011/08/18

Joe...you uneducated pig.... only useless people with HUGE hangups utter such garbage... Keep your foul mouth oppinion to yourself.... and God help you if one of your kids turn out Gay... good luck!

Reply to Another
Posted by: Joe | 2011/08/18

Pete2 .... look heres A Man, a moffie just like you. I suggest the both of you buy some rope and hang yourselves. Fagbitchessuckdick!!!

Reply to Joe
Posted by: Seth | 2011/08/18

Hi everyone,

Thank you so much for your advice and guidance. I really appreciate you all taking the time to respond and for looking out for me and for the rest of the forum users. Thanks Gary, Pete2, Sexologist, and ''A Man''.

All the best,
Seth

Reply to Seth
Posted by: a man | 2011/08/17

Joe has no meaningful response to the forum, just nasty useless words which shows what an idiot he is who has no tolerance for anything he thinks abnormal....shame!

Reply to a man
Posted by: Joe | 2011/08/17

Go suck a nut Pete2. Im sure u make mum very proud, u gay asswipe

Reply to Joe
Posted by: Pete2 | 2011/08/17

Joe, the only thing " sies"  here is your predjudice. Like it or not, that is your choice, but gays have sex too, and therefor sexual issues can also require advice from a sexologist. But how you feel is your choice. But please, please explain to me this: If you are SO GROSSED OUT by gays and gay sex, why then did you even click on this link, as the subject clearly says what it is about? Curious much? Or do you delight in abusing people who are not like you?

Reply to Pete2
Posted by: Joe | 2011/08/17

Go post this on the fag link. Sies man!

Reply to Joe
Posted by: Gary | 2011/08/16

Why not explain to him exactly how you did here. Share with him too what worries you and what it means to you. Surely if he is your partner, knowing this is your first experience he should understand. It is not about trusting each other, it is about doing the right and safe thing.
As for your questions on HIV, yes sperm DEFINITELY count as a body fluid, and has a very high concentraition of the HI virus in positive people. Even saliva of an HIV + person contains the virus, but in such a low concentration that there is no risk of infection.
As for anal sex, the anus has a lot of small veins and nerve ends. It is also possible that anal sex can create microscopic tears that you cannot see or feel, that could easily carry the virus into the bloodstream. I think that is why the risk is higher.

Reply to Gary
Posted by: Nasima | 2011/08/16

Gandu sale 11

Reply to Nasima

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
advertisement