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Question
Posted by: Kerry | 2009-08-11

Uncomfortable predicament

I moved in with my boyfireind (30yrs) a few months ago and feel really uncomfortable that he has given our house keys to his 29 year old brother who does not have a job and stays at our house all day. The brother comes in every morning before i go to work and is at our house when i get home in the evenings. i cook his meals and i feel that it' s time for him to try and be more independent and let my boyfriend and i have some space and time alone as he is completely dependent on us for money, food, etc. I have tried to bring this up y boyfriend but he feels that i am selfish and that i don' t care for his brother. I was not raised the same way and feel that my home is a place of my own privacy when i need it. i feel uncomfortable and frustrated and it' s causing problems in my personal life as well as my relationship as i now feel i' m in a relationship and mothering two people. i would not have left my own home had i known this was going to happen. How do i go about addressing the situation?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

When you say OUR house --- is it his, or yours, or do you both share ownership and costs ? Any way he should not have decided on his owmn to share it with his brother. Why should you cook meals for the lazy guy ? Why should you care for his brother ? Discuss this calmly with your boyfriend, and if he fails to see your very reasonable problem with this, then move back to your family, and be prepared to end the relationship. You agreed to live with one man, with whom you had a particular relatonship, not with two of them

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: G+ | 2009-08-13

While he sits at home he can do the washing, cleanup and cook supper (and fix all the broken things). That way he can " earn his keep" . He will get tired of being the maid and leave very soon!! Draw up a menu and time table for cleaning and washing and let him do something! You might even miss him when he leaves!

Reply to G+
Posted by: tt | 2009-08-12

you are so selfish girl the poor guy is not working, what if is your brother? welcomed heh!

Reply to tt

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