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Question
Posted by: worried | 2010-08-25

Two year old son

Hi,

I am currently 35 weeks pregnant and my son is almost two. He has been acting very strangely in the last few days, he normally sleeps through from 19:30 to 6:30, but was up the whole of last night. He sleeps in his own room in a cot, and everytime we got to him, he was standing up and crying, when we picked him up he would calm down and settle, and indicate that he wants to go back to the cot. We then let him lay down, only for him to wake crying again in 15 minutes time. Eventually my husband let him sleep on the bed in his room at about 3:00 and he then slept untill 7.

Could it be that he is frustrated by the cot, of is he sensing the arrival of the new baby? What can we do to ensure him of our love and effection, so he is not worried about the new baby?

Please could you advise, this is troubling me, as I myself is a depression sufferer and don''t know how to handle him, as well as my own feelings of doing something wrong?

Thank you

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

At his age, he's not intellectually capable of working out the details of a prospective new baby and possible rival - but he might pick up on any noticeable changes in yourselves, your moods and behaviours. Indeed, whatever the reason for your "own feelings of doing something wrong" , these in themselves are enough to upset a youngster.
When a new baby arrives, he can see that It gets attention and he doesn't ( at that time ) but right now he can't even imagine that.
What has been said to him ( if anything ) about your pregnancy and the expected arrival of the enw baby ?

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

3
Our users say:
Posted by: sally | 2010-08-25

yes of course that has everything to do with it. you need to make your son aware of your love and respect for him as the big brother once the baby arrives. In the meantime, just love him, love him, love him.

Reply to sally
Posted by: worried | 2010-08-25

We have always tried to make him feel part of the process, so when my stomack started to grow, we told him that there is a baby in my tummy, and we ask him to say hello to the baby. About three weeks ago we sat him down and explained that there is a baby in my tummy, as he wanted to climb all over me all the time, and we wanted him to understand that he had to be carefull not to hurt mommy or the baby.

I know that he is still very small and probably didn''t understand, but we didn''t know what else to do.

We really try to spend as much time with him at night when we get home, but sometimes we just don''t have all the time to give 100% to him.

He is normally such a independant, strong little boy and can entertain himself for hours, but lately he is very clingly and uncertain about himself. My friend had a baby about three weeks ago (and she is the mommy of my sons best friend, she is about 4 months younger than my one), I don''t know if maybe that has something to do with it?

Reply to worried
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010-08-25

At his age, he's not intellectually capable of working out the details of a prospective new baby and possible rival - but he might pick up on any noticeable changes in yourselves, your moods and behaviours. Indeed, whatever the reason for your "own feelings of doing something wrong" , these in themselves are enough to upset a youngster.
When a new baby arrives, he can see that It gets attention and he doesn't ( at that time ) but right now he can't even imagine that.
What has been said to him ( if anything ) about your pregnancy and the expected arrival of the enw baby ?

Reply to cybershrink

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