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Question
Posted by: dw | 2011-12-20

trust

Hi....I have been back with my ex for 2 weeks and one of the reasons he is back with me he says is because I am loyal. All his previous girlfriends/wives cheated on him and took him for a ride. So being loyal is a big thing for him. However, I dont know if he is being loyal to me as there is something about him that makes me not trust him. He is a very friendly, outgoing guy and can just walk into a room and get everyone going. I, on the other other hand, first have to suss out the situation and then I can chat. So girls take this over confidence of his as a draw card and maybe see it as though he is hitting on them. It worries me because trust is the basis of a relationship. I have spoken to him about this and he says I am the only one he is seeing. Do I just forget my intuition and trust him until proven otherwise? Thanks.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

If all his other gfs cheated on him, and he considers you loyal - why did he become your Ex ? People are often contradictory, so it wouldn't be surprising if he demands loyalty of the women in his life, without feeling any duty himself to be loyal to them.
I'm not sure in the situation you describe, that it's wise to assume him to be trustworthy. Maybwe explore this together with a counsellor ?

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5
Our users say:
Posted by: truth | 2011-12-20

sorry i thought this was a teenage dating problem - still do !
l apologize

Reply to truth
Posted by: dw | 2011-12-20

Truth - I am 40 years old!!!

Reply to dw
Posted by: truth | 2011-12-20

wait until yr matric results have come out and you have dcided what 2 do wiv yr life.
u are nt mature enough yet 4 a relationship

Reply to truth
Posted by: Romany | 2011-12-20

NEVER forget intuition. There is a very valid reason why you have it.
Have a chat with all the other girlfriends and wives maybe.
I struggle to believe that he can be always right and all the other girlfriends and wives wrong......

Reply to Romany
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-12-20

If all his other gfs cheated on him, and he considers you loyal - why did he become your Ex ? People are often contradictory, so it wouldn't be surprising if he demands loyalty of the women in his life, without feeling any duty himself to be loyal to them.
I'm not sure in the situation you describe, that it's wise to assume him to be trustworthy. Maybwe explore this together with a counsellor ?

Reply to cybershrink

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