advertisement
Question
Posted by: Silly | 2011/11/18

Trouble with change

Hello CS

I seem to notice I don''t deal with change all that well. I feel panic inside of me.

This one for example and I know it''s really silly but my boyfriend has helped me purchase a rather expensive camera. It is an investment and I have sold my old ones to get money to help towards the purchase. I feel so so guilty and I know this because it''s such a large amount of money that is being spent I am just not used to so much money being spend all at once. I am able to pay it back. The feeling I have could be described as undeserving of this gift. It''s not about being stingy either. I grew up not having much and I feel like I don''t deserve any better. I cannot explain how I feel but it''s a guilt undeserving feelings. My stomach is in knots.

You are probably wondering what has this got to do with change but it affects my life somehow.

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

We're not all automatically equiopped to deal well with changes, especially those that might challenge aspects of life that are really important to us. Part of what you're decribing, though, sounds more like low self-esteem ( I'm not deserving of nice things ) rather than difficulties in handling change as such. Assuming that you will allow yourself to actually use and enjoy the camera, rather than just feeling guilty and leaving it in its box, this could be a new thing, developing a hobby, maybe even raising eventual earning possibilities.
Counselling, especially of the CBT form, can really help to enhance your self-esteem and self-confidence - if you could persuade yourself that you're well worth such an investment !

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

2
Our users say:
Posted by: Amy | 2011/11/18

You are not silly I am the exact same. I got/had very little growing up and to this day (30 year old female) I hate spending money on myself, I will think 5 times before I even by myself and expensive lunch for example, or I will buy myself an expensive item and leave it in the cupboard aand not use it.

Reply to Amy
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/11/18

We're not all automatically equiopped to deal well with changes, especially those that might challenge aspects of life that are really important to us. Part of what you're decribing, though, sounds more like low self-esteem ( I'm not deserving of nice things ) rather than difficulties in handling change as such. Assuming that you will allow yourself to actually use and enjoy the camera, rather than just feeling guilty and leaving it in its box, this could be a new thing, developing a hobby, maybe even raising eventual earning possibilities.
Counselling, especially of the CBT form, can really help to enhance your self-esteem and self-confidence - if you could persuade yourself that you're well worth such an investment !

Reply to cybershrink

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
advertisement