Posted by: Mankind | 2012-01-31


I am in a relationship with a woman who has serious issues with the past. It never used to be a problem until I had the unfortunate task of taking her father of her in our kitchen. We have been in this relationship for 6 years and I found out about her temper very quickly. She gets upset over the most mundain stuff and when she explodes she uses me as an emotional puncing bag. And when I confront her to say she has her facts wrong I only agrevate the situation. When she is calm again she doesn''t understand why I am unhappy. It got to a point that when I told her that a marrage between us is not going to work she tried to commit suicide. An what''s worse is that she is going to blame me for it. It shook my foundation to the core that she is willing to go that far to keep me. I didn''t type the whole sory because I don''t think the blog is big enough but this is the short version. My focus know have changed to stay with her if only to keep her from doing something stupid, because I don''t think I will be able to cope with her possible death. So in esseance I am trapped. I still love but she is pulling me down with her. And after that little stint... I don''t know. Any advice?

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Our expert says:
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This IS emotional blackmail, and such people can cause much misery to oters, IF we accept their invitation to giv them the power and accept their blame for what had nothing to do with us. She sounds a very disturbed person who seriously needs psychological assessment and therapy, which would bnefit her and you too. If her father was assaulting or molesting her, he should have faced criminal charges, but he has probably managed to emotionally blackmail HER into not telling on him or mybe not even blaming him.
She was, apparently, damaged by him and you just not accept blame as a scapegoat.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Bron | 2012-01-31

sounds like emotional blackmail to me and not only women do it but men too. If you do love her ask her to see a psychiatrist to sort herself out. I find that its people who are emotionally insecure or have suffered some kind of trauma who behave like this. Its also very immature.

Reply to Bron
Posted by: Queen | 2012-01-31

You need to run like wind! Maybe she''ll kill herself after you''ve gone maybe she won''t. The point is, you found her already broken. Nothing you do will change that or fix her. And assuming you can''t fix her, run.

Life is too short....

Reply to Queen
Posted by: WANT-2-KNOW | 2012-01-31

where did i say you were a woman?

Reply to WANT-2-KNOW
Posted by: Mankind | 2012-01-31

If you read my blog carefully, you will see that I talk about "  her "  and " she" . I am not a woman.

Reply to Mankind
Posted by: WANT-2-KNOW | 2012-01-31

please read my " blog"  posting above yours, it seems as if you are in the same boat as many of us woman. Why do we stay with these people?

Maybe because EVERYBODY is screwed up? It seems like it to me.

Reply to WANT-2-KNOW

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