Home > Experts > Question Search health advice Find an answer Question Posted by: Mosadi | 2012/05/09 Q.Traditions Guys I need advise. I''m newly married & just recently became a mom. I''m a christian & do not believe in ancestors & the likes. My husband is christian but still values his traditions.My husband''s family wants to perform a specific ritual for our child that I do not agree with because it goes against everything I believe in. Hubby feels like I''m disrespecting his family, which is not my intention. I love my husband & do not want to appear disrespectful but how do you do something that goes against your beliefs? 49 Pin It user comments Posted by: anonforthisminute | 2012/05/11 AFT I worship uNkulunkulu wabo okuwuNkulunkulu yena lo omkhonzayo nawe. Reply to anonforthisminute Posted by: Anon for this | 2012/05/11 Yes there are Jacobs and Isaacs mentioned in the bible but nowhere in the bible does it say we must pray to them for protection of ourselves and our children. We only have to ask GOD.So there is definitely a difference between asking protection from ancestors and asking GOD. GOD also punished Moses people (in the desert) for worshiping idols and not GOD.Do you see its a different belief system. You either serve 1 or the other. If you trust and have faith in GOD you must believe he will protect you and your children. There is no need to fear MAN be it dead or alive because if GOD is with you who can be against you. Reply to Anon for this Posted by: anonforthisminute | 2012/05/11 Its really amazing coz in the prayers you hear abo AFT bathi the God of Abraham, Jacob and Isaac mdash mdash. Then bathi there are no ancestors, I say Nkulunkulu wabo gogo no khokho bethu. Abram< Jacob and Isaac okhokho nabo. Reply to anonforthisminute Posted by: Anonforthis | 2012/05/10 And its not about respect for the family as they claim.All races have different beliefs and cultures but all races have become westernised and have slowly opened their eyes to what is cruel and what is explotation.So if people choose to follow their own path they cannot say its disrespectful.Its disrespectful to preach and threaten others who are different and has wisened up to certain issues in tradition or culture that does not make sense in today''s world.Too many traditions are based on taboo and fear and subservience of woman. If woman today wants to break that mould of gogos threatening them with ancestors and spirits then its their choice. But you cannot live in fear just because its an age old custom put in place by Men to keep woman suppressed.Wake up woman. You dont have to ask your fiance for labola, you dont have to do womanhood rituals (barbaric and cruel) you dont have to wash a mans hands before he eats etc.We have risen as woman and we have to stand up for ourselves and stop hiding behind tradition for fear of dead people coming to punish you. You can show your respect to your elders but you dont have to worship or fear them. Reply to Anonforthis Posted by: Anonforthis | 2012/05/10 Porche I like the way you think - you are more liberal and also support others in whatever they believe.Its the narrowminded type of women like the Zee etc that wants to force traditional rituals down peoples throats but they themselves dont even follow the traditional ways.They want to be selective in what part of tradition they want to follow and then if you differ with them on rituals they want to threaten or intimidate african woman with ancestral vengeance and what not.They must remember that very ancestors they say is going to punish people like Mosadi are the same ancestors who are also watching them who are not honouring their so called traditions.That is why I asked them the questions about rituals and do they follow or participate in half of these ancestral rituals that they so vehemently protect.I bet they all have their clitoris, dont wash their mens hands before they eat, dont go in their bush. Whatever their origin Zulu, Venda, Tsonga each culture has a ritual that must be performed when they become woman.And I bet you half of them didnt do those rituals but they want to attack others who dont honour traditions.So the all hipocrits as far as am concerned Reply to Anonforthis Posted by: anonforthisminute | 2012/05/10 Well said Porsche.Wena Anon for this I feel sorry for your kids shame, uli coconut too much. Abafana nawe they end up bendiza ngomthanyelo. Reply to anonforthisminute Posted by: Porsche | 2012/05/10 @ AFTIf I or my family member gets sick, I will use whatever kind of medicine that will help, be it modern or traditional.Nothing wrong with donating organs to help others, but it must be one''s decision to make, not the hospitals. " Be a bit more open minded and embrace other peoples beliefs it could save your life" . Can''t agree with you more there. Reply to Porsche Posted by: Anon for this | 2012/05/10 A bit of info on umbilical cords and the benefits of why you should leave it at the hospitals.Different types of cell in the blood - red blood cells, white blood cells and platelets. Haematopoietic stem cells, purified from bone marrow or blood, have long been used in stem cell treatments for leukaemia, blood and bone marrow disorders, cancer (when chemotherapy is used) and immune deficiencies (HIV is an immune deficiency).Since 1989, haematopoietic stem cell transplants using umbilical cord blood have successfully treated children with leukaemia, anaemias and other blood diseases. Researchers are now looking at ways of increasing the number of these stem cells obtained from cord blood, so that they can be used to routinely treat adults too.Call me westernised but if you or a family member becomes ill you want modern medicine to cure you. So if we do a bit of research we can also educate ourselves on lots of issues as to why traditions and rituals is not always correct. So if Mandisa bury her childs umbilical cord in the name of tradition be it Indian or african tradition the point is science needs these organs. Leave it at the hospitals where it can be put to medical use.Be a bit more open minded and embrace other peoples beliefs it could save your life. Reply to Anon for this Posted by: Q | 2012/05/10 if this was like Facebook i would click on like kwi comment yakho Reply to Q Posted by: Porsche | 2012/05/10 @BG. Uyayazi mos sometimes kubanabantwana ekuthiwa ngabesingxobo (with me being one of them), kodwa we don''t hear that in hospital births. What do they do with that. Maybe that''s why Indians make sure they take the placenta with.If you notice, it''s mostly us blacks that are giving their backs to tradition. Reply to Porsche Posted by: Porsche | 2012/05/10 The same bible that says " Let the dead be dead" leads us to believe that the only way to the FATHER is through his son Jesus, who by the way died.... and woke up, but I''ve never heard anyone question that. I''ve also heard that he sometimes woke the dead.Let''s just believe in what we believe in instead of critisizing each other''s beliefs.I personally believe that tradition/culture and religion go hand in hand, so I guess that makes me serve more than one GOD. Even traditional healers pray for the muthi, which by the ways is also GOD''s creation. My mother didn''t believe in rituals as well, until I temporarily lost my eyesight. I was having problems with my eyes and for a long time and doctors couldn''t cure me, prayers and church couldn''t cure me until my father''s family insisted on the ritual. 3 days after the ritual I regained my eyesight. And oh, I would definitely wouldn''t mind walking around naked :), but then I''d be arrested, so blame the powers that be for westernizing us. Reply to Porsche Posted by: Anon for this | 2012/05/10 Wena I am married and NOT the traditional way. Both families were upset but they got over it. They love me and our child (I didnt do any traditional rituals)My family had to understand that for us to be in their lives they have to accept us for we who are and our beliefs.Mna, I am way pass this traditional issues. Me I practice what I preach. Why you dont answer my questions if fololw all your traditional rituals. Wena you know you don''t follow all the traditions and rituals. Reply to Anon for this Posted by: BG | 2012/05/10 ???....Apology accepted sisiza/bhutiza. I was shocked to learn that Jews when they move into a new house there''s a ritual done.A week before they move in, kuyiwa endlini, they place rice, flour, mealiemeal, ash and a candle to light. All these are put there in the new house, everyday before the moving in they go there to light that candle and pray..why all those things for seven days? so that kungabi nendlala, ash kuhlale kufudumele, candle the should always be light. The only people that go there during that 7 days it''s the couple and the inlaws..Indians...whether umfazi utetela esbhela, private or goverment they are there..immediately after birth they demand the placenta bahamba nayo, ukuthi what they do with it, nobody knows..they never ever leave their placentas esibhedlela njengoba ezethu siziyeka bazitshise kanti kudala yayitshiswa, abanye(Bakwena)yayilahlelwa emfuleni, abanye babeyishisa bayisile bayihlanganise nemithi yesintu then umntana uma egeza ithelwe emanzini ize iphele ... Haaaahhh...I wonder where''s mine? Reply to BG Posted by: ...... | 2012/05/10 I think " Anon for this" is mixing things. Ur bringing too many issues that are negating ur point. What ur saying is just " ke go telela" . Reply to ...... Posted by: Shame | 2012/05/10 Anon for this all this questions you are asking awengane eno 12 yrs " wahlanya aphe khanda" Reply to Shame Posted by: Shame | 2012/05/10 Anon for this no wonder you will never get married, I feel sorry for your children if you have one " they are a lost generation with no values, you encourages oma shlalisane yet you are preaching to know it all. Reply to Shame Posted by: Anon for this | 2012/05/10 And if you are so obsessed with tradition. Why do you wear bra''s and clothes. You supposed to walk topless like our ancestors. Why do you not wash your mans hands before he eats.Serve him like he is a king.Why do you enjoy sex when its not to be enjoyed by woman (according tradition) because its designed for reprodcution. Why do you accept top jobs and have men report to you in that position. (not traditional)And I can go on to list a whole lot of things you wont do in the name of tradition. But none of you want to live traditionally WHY??? Because you want the best of western world rules that suits your needs and wants but you want to get angry at me for not wanting to accept rituals.Aikhona, practice what you preach. Reply to Anon for this Posted by: Anon for this | 2012/05/10 I don''t believe in labola it is a system designed for families to exploit others. So the gogo''s etc can get nice clothes, furniture and livestock. HAYI.There should not be a price on a woman''s value. Its wrong because it exploited men and their families for financial gain.A child is a gift that a parent must raise and when that child wants to leave the house the parents should not expect repayment for doing what was their duty.Hayi that is wrong!!! Reply to Anon for this Posted by: anonforthisminute | 2012/05/10 Anon for this I will open another post to continue with this debate tomorrow coz I see you are the lost generation, awuzazi ukuthi uphumaphi and uyaphi along the way uzoshayeka and uzolahleka, in fact usulahlekile ukuze ubuye angazi ukuthi kuzothatha isikhathi esingakanani.Hlonipha uyihlo nonyoko ukuze izinsuku zakho zande emhlabeni, nina esenikwenza nizenzela intando yenu. Indlela enhle ibuzwa kwabadhala. Lafa elihle. Reply to anonforthisminute Posted by: Survey | 2012/05/10 Each race has its own traditions and cultures.I for one do not follow all the traditions in my culture mainly because I believe that as we grow older we get wiser and we see some things that is traditional as senseless.One of the things my family believed in when I was growing up was you must get all the dutch medicines (rooilavental, eucalyptus oil etc) and mix it and rub the new born baby with it because it will supposedly strengthen their bones and body and whatever else things concotions are supposed to be doing.I never rubbed my kids with itt because it smells terrible and its like they say old folks beliefs. My husbands family was upset and so was my family but I told them this is my child and I will do what I think is right for them. Traditions is not always right just because it was practised for years.Guess what my kids are healthy grown up and strong and not thanks to any traditional herbal therapy etc.Alot of things that made sense to the old people when it comes to traditions does not make sense in today''s world.Don''t get sucked into old folk tales and beliefs to the point where you fear the worst if you don''t follow it.With regards to the previous posting of rituals of woman''s clitoris being cut and live in the bush etc. I mean look at it - what african woman in today''s life will still have those things done to them. Its mutilation of the genitals yet back in the day the old folk believe it was right. Does that make any sense to you.I mean really catch a wake up here people. Reply to Survey Posted by: Shame | 2012/05/10 Anon for this inkinga yenu ningamathatha anilwazi nalokukholo esenilithanda ukudlula amasiko enu ukuthi where does it comes from.When it suits you anihlangani nokwesintu but okunye niyakwenza niyaphapha straight.You are trying to tell us that when someone wants to marry you he wont pay a cent for you just because you are not supersticious? Reply to Shame Posted by: Anon for this | 2012/05/10 @Anonforthisminute.Jewish circumcision and bazmitvahs is part of jewish religion and tradition. Its is their belief and their tradition. Get it!You missing the point. Mosadi does not practice traditional cultures or beliefs. She is christian and therefore don''t want to do the traditional rituals. So are you saying that african children who get sick or die is because their parents did not do the traditional ritual. If that is the case then no african child would ever have died if the ritual was performed because the ancestors has protected them. Yet they still die as we speak. So what do you tell those parents who had the rituals performed on their children and then the child still dies. There is a fine line between ones beliefs and one superstition.Suga Wena sisi!!! You are way too superstitous to the point where you cant see the difference between myth and fact.Once again you cannot believe in GOD and then run to ancestors for protection. Then why believe in GOD if you believe that your ancestors will protect you.You cannot serve 2 masters. Don''t go live westernised and then preach tradition. If you follow tradition then you have to follow it and live the traditional tribal way. You can''t have it both ways. Reply to Anon for this Posted by: anonforthisminute | 2012/05/10 BG just leave this people kuningi abangakwazi. Kade kwakholwa ogogo nokhokho bethu bebakholwa kodwa thina zizenza ncwelencwele. I fail to understand ukuthi why we blacks are like this. Really I have seen different people of different cultures and I still say we blacks singabo thathekile, sindlula nawo wonke umoya ondlulayo. I am a believer of God but usiko wusiko ngiyalwenza.In jewish tradition when a boy is born he gets circumcised after thirteen days. At the age of 13 wenzelwa a party they bathivsma(sp) that is their tradition they still do to this day. We like adopting the western tradition engekho siyisizwe esilahlekile finish and klaar. Mosadi wena when you agreed to get married to hubby didn''t you discuss about having children what will happen afterwards? By the look of it there was never a communication between the two of you hence you don''t want the ritual to be performed to your baby. My step brother was paralysed for months because of ubu thunderhead buka mamakhe the all you know people like you nibona ukuthi amasiko yinto yokudlala. All I can say is gamble your child''s life one day otla lelela motsotso girl and believe you me your hubby will never forgive you for that. Uma ushada uyayalwa, they tell you ukuthi you now belong to that family okwenziwa khona nawe kwenze. I think your hubby must ask the elders to go back home uyolaywa kabusha. Mazibuyele emasisweni sizwe sakithi. Reply to anonforthisminute Posted by: Zee | 2012/05/10 Bella, I won''t comment. But you are right, asifani sisi. Mina, there are certain things that my family does, which I respect. Kuyasilwa back home......and I won''t look down at my mom or my inlaws when they do it. When they come to ask for my hand in marriage, I''ll have to cover myself, etc. Kuzoxhelwa ekhaya on my wedding, even though I have a venue (and there will be catered food), maar abantu abadala bazoxhela, kojiwe, etc. When someone dies, kuyasilwa, kutshiswe amaqhosha, etc. When a boy comes of age, uya entabeni, oluke, etc. These are just some of our traditions, which I understand......not just grew-up seeing them being done. I respect all the above things, and they have nothing to do with my relationship with God. NB: Our elders believed kuMvelingqange, uQamata. Christiaanity is not new, though some people wear it life fashion and seem to hide behind it, blah blah blah!! Reply to Zee Posted by: Shame | 2012/05/10 Bella I am sorry but you are mumbling, you are mixing things here.Where does doing retual for the child be serving 2 masters. You are so judgemental and hiding behind the Christ. Yinina laba enizoshiswa ngomhla wokuphela. Reply to Shame Posted by: Gogo | 2012/05/10 i have read some of the stories or advice. What i need to tell you Mosadi. Nothing will happen to your son they have done those rituals when he was young and maybe even to you. But you need to respect your in laws or you want to build a wall. Life goes around. Its only one day and its done. Life goes on. This is Africa Reply to Gogo Posted by: ??? | 2012/05/10 BG did not mean to offend you just asked the question based on the two different believe systems. Reply to ??? Posted by: Bella | 2012/05/10 all i know you cant serve 2 masters at the same time and the bible says let the dead be dead...some of us are doing things that we dont even know where they come from and why they are done...we do them in the name of hayi ndikhule ekhaya kusenziwa njalo and when you ask why? no answer...but ke asifanai and our belliefs are not the same... Reply to Bella Posted by: BG | 2012/05/10 Hi ???Typical a christian. Nithanda kabi ukuzenza ongcwelengcwele, ingathi christianity is the best thing that has ever happenned after Mandela''s release from prison.Is there anywhere in my postings did I mention whether I believe in God or the dead. All i did was to explain why the umblical cord, which i believe as mosadi''s posting her child is still alive it has nothing to do with the dead or alive person.Just to enlighten you...knowing your culture and following certain rituals like this one of Mosadi''s hubby does not mean you''re a non believer to God...let''s leave this one for another day, for now let''s give Mosadi the idea why the umblical cord and hair.To answer you I''m a believer, and I owe it to no one what I believe in. Reply to BG Posted by: ??? | 2012/05/10 Question to BG if you believe in Ancestors how can you believe in GOD cause the two beliefs arecontradicting each other.Ancestors are mortals who lived and moved on to ancestral resting place.Yet the living still pray to them and ask for blessings. And if you don''t honour them thenyou believe they have the power to destroy you.So how if you believe that a mortal (mere Man) have such power over you when they dead can you still believe in a living GOD (who is immortal by the way)You cannot serve GOD and still honour traditions that includes calling up dead spirits. So what are you a christian believing in GOD but at the same time you honour a tradition that worships dead men/women Reply to ??? Posted by: A | 2012/05/10 Medieval if u ask me. Don''t do it. Reply to A Posted by: THANDAZA(BG) | 2012/05/10 Zee...I so wish that most of us africans can hold pride and have knowldege about our tradition. I was listening to pastor Zondo the other day, he says as much as i''m a christian today, but uma ngiya kithi kunomsebenzi angibagxeki, ngikhule impepho ngiyirhogela it never killed me so why should ngigxeke abantu abarhogela impepho namhlanje. He says uma ngifika kithi kunomsebenzi kuphuzwa umqombothi ngiyawuphuza, zange wabulala muntu. He says kwam I don''t do rituals, but i still respect my parent''s beliefs, so when i get home kunomsebenzi i respect them.. Reply to THANDAZA(BG) Posted by: Zee | 2012/05/10 BG, we posted at the same time. Thank you, at least there''s another person who understands this tradition and what it symbolises. Mosadi, BG is right about the info she has given, and yes, no one is there when igujelwa inkaba. Reply to Zee Posted by: Zee | 2012/05/10 Anon for this, I take it back that she doesn''t have to understand it. However, it seems to me that she is not open to understanding it, is not asking the relevant questions to the owners of this tradition, but is set on refusing this being done, because it''s against her beliefs, etc. She must respect it then. I wish I can explain it in Xhosa ......because I grew-up around people who practiced this (before I became a citizen of Jozi). The way I remember it is, the family does it to show pride to the new addition, its a big deal to the family and symbolises a lot in terms of where the child''s place is in the family. It''s not to harm the child. Umbilical Chord or Inkaba, as they call it ngesintu. Have you ever heard or been asked ukuthi " Inkaba yakho ikuphi" ? Ngesintu, inkaba is burried at the home and this symbolises that they are planting your roots there (your child''s). What this family wants to do is a welcome ceremony for the child. Mosadi, may I suggest that you speak to someone who can explain to you why the family and your husband thinks it''s necessary that this be done? Reply to Zee Posted by: THANDAZA(BG) | 2012/05/10 Sisi...ask the elders, tell them you don''t understand and you want to learn and understand why all the procedure.Okay...normally the amblical cord iyagujelwa, that is done by one person maybe the father to hubby or uncle or the mother on absence of the two. Uma eyigubhela no one is there, it''s only let''s say you, hubby, FIL. They did a deep hole like early in the morning when all are still sleeping or during the day when no one is there. That is to proudly have inkaba(umblical cord) yomntana known where it is.Thina kwa Xhosa uye ubuzwe ukuba inkaba yakho iphi...hhheee uthole umntu ehlahle amehlo not knowing what this person is talking about, maybe shame he/she was in the same situation where the parents just flushed the umblical cord into the toilet. Reply to THANDAZA(BG) Posted by: Romany | 2012/05/10 YOUR child, thay YOU will bring into this world, that YOUR husband fathered?I fail to see how the in-laws can lay claim to ANY part of this child?What the hell? It is 2012 not 1812.......Put your foot down, you sound like a modern and independant woman.Well done !!And to everyone with the weierd threatening predictions about not doing this funny stuff! Oh please...... look around you, look at all the healthy people nd children?? Reply to Romany Posted by: Anon for this | 2012/05/10 Mosadi I understand what you mean. Those are body parts of your child that is involved.Its a personal choice and nobody can judge you for following your beliefs.You adopted the Christian way of life and so did your husband. So the family must respect that. Reply to Anon for this Posted by: Anon for this | 2012/05/10 @ Zee how can you tell someonei they dont not have to understand the tradition but she must respect it. Surely before you can allow a ritual you have to understand it after all this is her child that must go through the ritual. What mother will let her child go through a ritual if she dont know what the ritual involves.Why can''t the family understand Mosadi''s belieFs and respect her beliefs.Did you follow all the traditions of your culture ??? Be honest!So don''t judge Mosdani when most woman today - judging from their posts - dont anyway respect or honour their traditions.You cant live 50/50 you either traditional or you not. Reply to Anon for this Posted by: Mosadi | 2012/05/10 Thank you for your input guys, I really appreciate it. My problem with this ritual is that it involves my son''s personal things like his umblical cord & his hair being buried in a ditch. What happens if someone comes & undigs this things & then does some vodoo stuff with them? I just don''t know but will ask God to lead me into the right decision for my son''s sake. Reply to Mosadi Posted by: Anon for this | 2012/05/10 Mosadi can you elaborate what part of the ritual clashes with your believes.Maybe if you articulate what is bothering you about the ritual then one can perhaps see how you can prevent the part that bothers you or work around it.Be realistic people how many of you have honoured every aspect of your tradition? You either traditional or you not you cant want to select certain rituals of your tradition and the others you see as taboo.To use some traditional examples:Zulu girls - did you collect the root when you menstruated and ate porridge for 7 days and stayed indoors throughoutTswana girls - did you go in the bush for months in winter when you became a womanVha Venda woman, - removal of the clitoris for young girlsMosadi has found the Christian way of life and she don''t to do feel comfortable with the rituals. She has chosen another path and the family should respect that.Most traditions are not honoured and people select what they want to honour and practice. Reply to Anon for this Posted by: Zee | 2012/05/10 It seems that you were never guided/ advised as to what happens umuntu uma eshadile. Families have customs and traditions that they believe in, and unfortunately, you have to respect them and you are now part of them. They paid lobola for you, right? When you were welcomed into the family, didn''t they slaughter - have a gathering, bakwembese, to welcome you into the family? That was tradition. When a child is born, in some families they slaughter a goat or sheep, make umqombothi and the family gathers to welcome the child/ introduce the child to the family and ancestors, bayambeka umntwana ukuthi aziwe! If it''s a boy, ayi ke, that''s the pride of the family, and your husband wants to show-off unyana wakhe, while the elders want to show off umuntu who is going to carry forward the family name. The tradition is not to harm the child, it is made out of love. You don''t have to understand it, but you must respect it. For your marriage, your relationship with your husband, and for the relationship with your inlaws, don''t fight them. Bahloniphe, and allow them to do what needs to be done. If you don''t, it says you don''t respect them, all of them, including your husband. Reply to Zee Posted by: THANDAZA(BG) | 2012/05/10 Hi MosadiAs Shad puts it, mawufika bedla amakati nawe uyawadla...that''s what one gets told uma esehamba eya emzini. I doubt ukuthi kusayalwa the way we do not respect and having fights with our inlaws.Your child is it a boy or girl? It''s worse when it''s a boy.Now sisi as much the baby is your child it''s his as well. Does this ritual involve you being done anything? If wena angeke ugcatshwe noma ukhothiswe they only do it to the child, let it be. Don''t forget it''s not about you but it''s about the child. As they will be doing the ritual just talk to your God and say Nkulunkulu kwazi wena, my inlaws are doing a ritual to my child konke nginikezela kuwe. Once one gets married it''s no longer about you only, your husband as well.Sometimes yithi esizimoshela the relations with our inlaws. Reply to THANDAZA(BG) Posted by: Nommy | 2012/05/10 Hi Guys!Mosadi I do understand your concerns however you must remember that when we give birth to our children they do not belongs to us a parents alone But also to the Family. For the sake of your child just allow it to happen, as you can''t win on this one cc!If your child can be sick right now or anything bad happened to him/her I promise you they will say it happened because you didn''t do ab& c, I am sure you don''t need that into your shoulder.Welcome to a mamaland :) Reply to Nommy Posted by: lolly | 2012/05/10 perfectly fine Reply to lolly Posted by: Lolly | 2012/05/10 We grew performing these rituals and Mosadi tell me when they welcomed you in the family did they perform some kind of ritual for you? i would say don’ t make things difficult and strain your marriage because of this it’ s their culture and you one of them now, do what needs to be done after. My own sister lost her husband for the same reasons and they still carried on with the ritual without her and the child is perfectly. Reply to Lolly Posted by: Me. | 2012/05/10 well I dont know what you will decide but I know a friend of mine was in the same situation is urs and she put her foot down and the ritual was not performed, after the baby was just older that 1 year 6 months the baby started getting sickly with funny staff that docters could not really diagnose, after the baby started having sort of ''fits'' time and again, they went to a ''prophet'' at St John Apostle Church and there they told them there was a traditional ritual they had to perform for the baby but did not and so the uncestors were sort of ''seeking'' the child. After all the sickness shen went through the mother finally agreed to do that ritual, and ever since the baby never got that sick again and she is now 24 years of age.So its ur choice. Reply to Me. Posted by: ..... | 2012/05/10 I think u must put ur foot down... Don''t let the kid do that stupid ritual. It doesn''t work that way Reply to ..... Posted by: Brendan | 2012/05/10 What is a tradition?Heard about the story of the newlyweds. The woman was making preparing turkey for Christmas dinner. She cut off a huge chunk before she put it in the oven. The husband was curious. Anyway the same thing happened the following year. So he asked her why she did that. The wife replied that she didnt know, she did it because her mom did it, it was a family tradition. So they went to the granny. Granny laughed and told them that in the early days they were so poor the only pot she could afford was too small for the turkey so she cut a portion off so it could fit in the pot.A tradition is nothing but superstition. Bet your husband doesnt even know why he wants to do what he wants to do. You have your beliefs so stick to them! Reply to Brendan Posted by: Shad | 2012/05/10 Remember after marriage you must do what the new family is doin if ba ya thagatha u must must thagatha as well, do as the say or the baby will become sick of unknown sickness until the rituals is performed. Its not lyk ur baby is gonin to die after the riruals . Save your marriage and do likewise. Reply to Shad Want to comment? Your name (optional) Your comment To prevent spam please solve this simple math problem: × Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly. × Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly. Reply to Your name (optional) Your comment To prevent spam please solve this simple math problem: advertisement From our sponsors There are more than 200 different viruses which can cause a cold A clinically proven skin care range is now available Medihelp’s regional information sessions Superior comfort and support