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Question
Posted by: teardrop | 2012/04/05

totally confused

hi doc, me again.

i don''t have medical aid i need to speak to someone i am going crazy with what is going on in me and i don''t know how to handle everything anymore.

yes my husbands boss is still in the picture, seeing him more often and talking to him more and wanting to be with him more is driving me crazy.

i have been in a faul mood lately, mostly crying and catching myself thinking of him. and realizing that i do feel more than i should.

it''s easy for other people to condem me but they don''t know how it feels.

thank you

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

As far as I can recall your situation, your misery is self-chosen and self-imposed. You have chosen to allow yourself to become infatuated with a man with whom more attempts at having an affair will only cause more misery all round. And much of the misery is not only created by you, but is genuinely a form of self-pity. Stop seeing the other man, and keep reminding yourself that your "relationship" with him is a fantasy you created to entertain yourself rather than work to engance your marriage.
Explore creatively, and you should be able to find some source of free or at least economical counselling, maybe even from a church. But don't expect anyone to encourage you to continue to indulge yourself in the luxury of romantic fantasies. Solve the real problems you have, rather than creating problems youdon't need to have.
And even without medical aid, consider what the disaster you are creating would cost, and ratgher forego other luxuries and get some counselling. FAMSA may be able to recommend some economical sources ; maybe the nearest training school for counsellors, social workers or psychologists could provide help free.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

2
Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/04/06

As far as I can recall your situation, your misery is self-chosen and self-imposed. You have chosen to allow yourself to become infatuated with a man with whom more attempts at having an affair will only cause more misery all round. And much of the misery is not only created by you, but is genuinely a form of self-pity. Stop seeing the other man, and keep reminding yourself that your "relationship" with him is a fantasy you created to entertain yourself rather than work to engance your marriage.
Explore creatively, and you should be able to find some source of free or at least economical counselling, maybe even from a church. But don't expect anyone to encourage you to continue to indulge yourself in the luxury of romantic fantasies. Solve the real problems you have, rather than creating problems youdon't need to have.
And even without medical aid, consider what the disaster you are creating would cost, and ratgher forego other luxuries and get some counselling. FAMSA may be able to recommend some economical sources ; maybe the nearest training school for counsellors, social workers or psychologists could provide help free.

Reply to cybershrink
Posted by: Kate | 2012/04/05

If you carry on with this then you will always feel the way you feeling right now? Is he worth all that? Is he worth the pain you feel right now?

Reply to Kate

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