Our expert says:
True love never involves loving anyone "more than life itself" - that's more like falling in love with the fantasy of being in love, and far from realistic or attainable or healthy. You both sound very immature, and she sounds irresponsible in the way she has been treating her fiancee and you, and highly minipulative of both of you. Triangles NEVER EVER WORK. They're an erotic fantasy.
Your life without her would be much longer and happier and healthier than any attempt to live with her. If it came down to just the pair of you, if the fiancee withdrew, don't imagine for a moment that she'd be any happier or more peaceful with you than she already is with him.
You can't "make her choose" and she's probably rather enjoying this drama with 2 of you stuggling over her. I doubt that she has "become extremely depressed" rather than highly emotional at times, and perhaps aware of how successful that can be as a manipulator of others. SHE HAS NOT BEEN BROKEN DOWN.
Please see a local copunsellor to help you see how broadly destructive and unwholesome this whole affair is, and to gain realism and grow up enough to move on and form a normal relationship with a nice ordinary person who is free to love you back, and not committed to someone else.
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