Posted by: Solia | 2009-03-11

To tell or not to tell...


I really need some urgent advice and help.. I am 9 weeks pregnant, tried to keep it quite but somehow through so-called close friends a whole lot of other people at work now know as well.

I came back to the job I am at in Oct. 2008 so am only back about 6 months or so. Even though I have only been gone from the firm for about 2 months (at that time), they put me back on a probation period and that only expires in April. I am also working for a new partner, not the one I used to work for and he gets very difficult when it comes to pregnant woman. He feels like they are incompetent and his senior secretary also left in Feb. so I basically took over her position.

So no, this probably isn' t the best of timing in the world for him, but it' s not his choice, but know that so many people at work know, I' m scared that he might hear it from someone else and not from me and that' ll upset him even more.

This is supposed to be a happy wonderful time in my life but I keep worrying about how to tell him and how he' s going to handle it (also right before our salary increases at the end of March).

Do I tell him sooner rather than later and how do I approach the situation in the correct way?

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Our expert says:
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What is the reason you wanted to keep this news secret ? ( this influences how to handle the situation now ). And at least now you've learned how some people are more of a gossip than a close friend. Check with a labour lawyer, HR in your company, and the Dept of Labour about such protections that exist in the workplace, for pregnant women. If it seems likely that the guy you work for will learn this from others, best that you speak to him first. Its not your fault that his senior secetary left, and one assumes you didn't fall pregnant deliberately so as to cause problems for anyone

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