Our expert says:
OK. A very important aspect of many questions, is : Has he always been like this, but lately you find it harder to accept ? OR is this s significant and recent CHANGE in how he is ? And apparently, from your reply, it's the latter in the situation you describe.
I har his answer to the counseling issue, but there's no time limit on needs - that's like saying, " Don't bother to call the fire brigade, the house has only been burning for 10 minutes. "
I'm sure its more his fear of what you might disclose that inhibits him - like the kid who's worried about the fire, but doesn't want to admit he was playing with matches.
As for effects on the kids, obviousl; that can't be exactly prophecied, but generally they do better with a loving parent in a situation which minimizes the obvious conflict between the parents. Just staying together miserably is no benefit to them
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