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Question
Posted by: Anne | 2011/03/08

To Bubbles, re fiance''s will

My dear lady.

If you are already deciding now, before you even have a marriage contract what should be happening to this man''s money, he is in for the high jump once he marries you.

If he has but one braincell between his ears, he will run a mile, and find himself a person who will appreciate him for his kind heart and caring nature.

I feel sorry for him, and I wish him luck, and all you other sharks that said get legal advice - my word - can people really be so shallow? The answer is obviously YES.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I agree, the questioner unwittingly made it very clear that her motivation in marriage is largely financial, and her fiancee should take warning from her gross over-reaction to his very modest planned bequest to his family, which he so honestly told her about.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Anne | 2011/03/09

Bubbles, I would definitely not go anywhere near you with a ten ton barge pole. Yes, it is a matter of principle. You want to be the only one who " scores" . Youa re immature and selfish, and I really hope this man sees the light before he enters into marriage with you. It''s his money to do with as he sees fit. No one should be dictating to him who the money goes to. My only concern once they arrive, is that my children must be provided for. For the rest, it''s his to do with as he pleases.

Reply to Anne
Posted by: Vaal Donkie | 2011/03/08

Oh please!

Reply to Vaal Donkie
Posted by: I agree with you BB | 2011/03/08

Bee Bee l think these guys are being deliberately obtuse. To someone who has read both postings you are not coming across as mercenary but sensible.
I wish you good luck - but l would not marry someone whos whole estate did not pass to me unless he had legal obligations to fulfill.
Stick to your principles.

Reply to I agree with you BB
Posted by: Liza | 2011/03/08

Before you get married, you should really have a antinuptial contract. This is to protect both of you financially. After all, you don''t want him to die and then the nieces are entitled to things that are actually yours. You don''t want to have to sell the house/car etc just so the nieces can have their share of the pie. It''s not fair to you.

Him wanting to give the nieces something is admirable BUT it must be carefully thought out. Just saying in his will that they should get 10% will cause a LOT of problems. It''s simply too vague. Perhaps he can name them as the beneficiaries of a specific life insurance policy that equals about 10% of his assets?

Good Luck
Liza

Reply to Liza
Posted by: Bee-Bee (Bubbles) | 2011/03/08

... besides: the nephews and nieces after very well looked after. The parents live in R8 million houses and property all over the globe.

Reply to Bee-Bee (Bubbles)
Posted by: Bee-Bee | 2011/03/08

No, Cybershrink... if you read my question again, you will see that I said it is not about the money but PRINCIPLE.

I also invest in the relationship and household financially -in fact, more than him as I earn a lot more. So, I don''t know where you came to the conclusion that my motivation is financially.

The PRINCIPLE is that he should discuss this with me, because once we are married, we are a partnership... a union. What is yours is mine and what is mine is yours. That is what he wants as well.

So, I ask you.... is your wife not gonna discuss it with you when she decides to take money and give it away or even buy an expensive item?

I am very willing to leave my entire estate to him and felt hurt that he is not willing to do the same - that is all.

Anne: YES, we have discussed this EVEN BEFORE the marraige as we have to have a contract and our will in order BEFORE we can get married. We are actually gonna see the lawyer this weekend as the minister needs the docs to proceed with the legal aspect of the marraige.
Some people do like to plan things... even the not-so-nice things in life.

I am disgusted in you for judging me without knowing me.





Reply to Bee-Bee
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011/03/08

I agree, the questioner unwittingly made it very clear that her motivation in marriage is largely financial, and her fiancee should take warning from her gross over-reaction to his very modest planned bequest to his family, which he so honestly told her about.

Reply to cybershrink

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