Posted by: Mom | 2008-11-18

To all parents using time out chair/spot


Today I took my four-year-old into my lap.
This was his time-out.
Time to cuddle with mommy
And hear how much he means to me.
Not him sitting alone in a chair
Feeling as if everyone hates him.

I’ m not the perfect parent.
I yell, throw things at my kids
And say mean stuff sometimes.
Today my kid was acting
Like what other people might call a brat
Kicking his brother
Knocking over toys
And yelling at the top of his lungs
To bug us all.

So I went over to him, lifted him up
And held him close, just us.
I told him he is special to me
He melted, tension flowed away
Centre of my world
He relaxed, aaaah… 
After a few minutes
He jumped off my lap
And went to play quietly with his brother.

I watched in awe.
I finally listened to my insides
That said children need love
Not punishment.
To be the centre of one’ s world
For just a few minutes
In the time-out chair.
Alaina Chapman, Dunster, BC, Canada*
*Used with permission

This article first appeared in the July 2008 issue of Your Child. All copyright hereto belongs to Alchemy Publishing (Pty) Ltd.

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Our expert says:
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I agree with Also a mom --- its not an either/or choice. Time-out has its place, as does concentrated applications of love --- especially if its connected with praise for all the child has done well, rather than entirely random, which can be confusing for him

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Our users say:
Posted by: Leez | 2008-11-19

Sounds like a poem written by the Cosby Family.....

Reply to Leez
Posted by: Zexeon | 2008-11-18

Next time he has a need to be cuddled and told how special he is he would probably just act out, please.

Reply to Zexeon
Posted by: Me | 2008-11-18

Nice poem but I cant help wonder if this was posted by one of the moms that use smacking as punishments the other day. LOL imagine saying time-out is cruel and instead the kid just needs a klap. I think time-out has its place - kids need punishment sometimes and I think its a very effective way to teach them right from wrong.

Reply to Me
Posted by: Also a mom | 2008-11-18

Sometimes just love doesnt cut it.

Sorry to burst your bubble the DO need punishment as well.

In a perfect world maybe love would be all they needed, reality is another story.

Reply to Also a mom

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