Tired all the time!

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Posted by: Wife | 2012/09/11

Q. Tired all the time!

Hi there.
Im in my 40`s and have 2 kids, 4 and 7.for the last mnth or so im extremly tired during the day.i wake up at about 6,and then 9 o clock the tiredness begin,12o clock i can hardly keep my eyes open,when my kids come out of school,me and my little girl of 4 goes to bed for about an hour.At night i cant wait to go to bed,its about 21h30.(if i dont sleep during the day,im tired at 7already!
The thing is my hubby worked overseas for about 4 years(ive spoken to you about other stuff before and mentioned this),and only came on holiday for 3.5 weeks at a time.Now for the last 4 mnths he is home again.He snores something out of this world,I cant talk to him about his snoring ,he gets very offensive(understandable cause he cant help snoring)Before we had kids i slept with earplugs,cant now because of my small kids who still needs me at night.
This is the only thing i can think of that makes me so tired,when i sleep i sleep good,but i wake up about 3 times a night because of hubbys snoring,and will be awake for about half an hour!
This lack of good sleep and extreme tiredness is affecting the way i feel during the day,irritated and just not even in the mood for romantic stuff.
Maybe this is just a rant from my side,but what do you suggest will help in some way??hubby will not go for help,ive talked to him ,and told him i understand he cant help snoring,i also think he has sleep apnee,because ,lots of times i can hear him stop breathing!He went to a ENT once and he told him his Now if i speak about it,he just says " mmm,i cant help snoring" ,and thats the end of discussion!
Am i just neurotic and looking for something there isnt,or is there some other reason i just want to go lie in bed and sleep!??

Expert's Reply

A.

Sleep Expert

Try sleeping for a night in another room. If you feel a lot better the next day, then it is probably your husband's snoring that is disturbing your sleep. If not, then we need to see what is wrong with your own sleep!

As far as your husband is concerned - it is not just a matter of snoring. If he does, in fact, have sleep apnoea, then his risk of having a heart attack could be as much as 23 times the normal for age - he may be uninsurable. His risk for a car accident could be as much as 7 times normal - it may be illegal for him to be driving.

I am aware of at least 2 cases where people fell asleep behind the wheel and were successfully sued for many millions.

The point is that it is not "just" snoring. He is putting his own life at risk, and because of your own sleep disturbance, he is putting your and your children's lives at risk, because if YOU are tired, you are also in no state to be driving a car.

You are going to need to be tough with him. You will have to insist that he sees a sleep doctor, failing which either he sleeps in another room, or you sleep in another room. Or else make sure that he has a very good life insurance policy!

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