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Question
Posted by: MOEDELOOS | 2003-12-02

Q.

TIENERSWANGERSKAPPE!!!

Ek wil net aan die meisies daar buite sê,stop julle seksuele verhoudings onmiddellik.Ek was 19 en het swanger geraak,die ou wou 'n aborsie hê, maar op die einde het ons die verhouding 'n kans gegee en vandag is ons getroud,al 6 maande.die kind is ook gebore.Ek word oor 2 maande 21 en wens ek het nooit die fout gemaak om my waardigheid aan hom te gee nie.Ek verlang na my lewe sonder 'n kind.Dit vat baie van 'n mens, en nou wonder ek of 'n aborsie nie 'n uitweg sou wees nie,maar wie het die reg om 'n kind se lewe te neem wie nie gevra het om hier te wees nie.
Dink mooi.Ek het voorbehoeding gebruik.Nou wat was die doel met alles.Ek voel moeg,en moedeloos.Sukkel om alles te doen wat 'n ma moet doen en die verantwoordelikheid voel te groot.Ek sit en wens die tyd om sodat die kind kan groot word en uit die huis kan gaan.My huwelik begin nou ook met probleme.Maan skyn en rose bestaan nie.Dis alles harde werk.As 'n mens groot mense dinge doen, betaal jy die res van jou hele lewe.So julle daar buite,moenie dieselfde fout maak nie.!!!!!!

Expert's Reply

A.

Expert ImageGynaeDoc

If you really feel that you are not coping, you could be suffering from postnatal depression. Seeing a counsellor might help.

Best wishes

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

2
user comments

C.

Posted by: Norma | 2003-12-03

I think Kippie is correct, I'm not in the same situation but my mom was 19 when she had me, also a "moet troue", you can just think in those days it was a big thing, she and dad had very hard times, mom had to take a job and couldnt studdy, same for dad, but they mad it. Brother was born 4 years later and dad past away 3 years after.
I can say that mom never ever blamed me for anything, she's the best mom in the world. And I know mom always loved me and always will (even though I messed up her teenage years)
Mom is now a very proud granny to be.

Just stop thinking about yourself and think about your baby, I'm 6weeks pregnant and cant wait to hold my baby.


I do feel sorry for you, but you need to get your act together.
Good luck girl

Reply to Norma
Posted by: Kippie | 2003-12-03

Hi Moedeloos
Although I sympathise with you, and your warning hold water, this is not always the case with all women that fall pregnant at a young age.
I was 18 when I fell pregnant - out of stupidity, because I did not use anything, and 19 when I had my daughter. I can honestly say, that not even for 1 day, not even when she was sick, did I feel cheated out of my teenage years.
We also got married 3 months into the pregnancy and had a happy marriage.
I had my second daughter at the age of 22 and the same goes there. Ofcourse we also had our up and down days but I would not trade my 2 daughters for anything, not even to get my youth back.
Sadly my husband passed away from an heridetary illness when the girls were 4 and 1 years and I had to bring them up on my own for 5 years, after which I married another wonderful husband and I am currently expecting our baby, we are now married for 6 years.

So, eventhough your warning is of value and ofcourse a teenage pregnancy is far from the ideal setting, it can also turn out to be a wonderful marriage and loved children.
Do not do this to your child by wishing her out of the house, you are doing her a GREAT deal of damage, that cannot be replaced or be repaired - think twice before you make such comments and rather make the best out of your situation - even if it is not for you - but for your child.
You are EXTREMELY selfish to think this way - your child did not ask to be conceived - you have to 'pay' for your actions - so pay for it everyday by giving your child all the love and care that you can - and treasure your husband,, because you never know what can happen tomorrow.

Reply to Kippie

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