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Question
Posted by: questionable | 2008/09/11

This always happens. I don' t get it!!!!

A guy will be so interested me, things will lead to another then we'  re close and dating and doing the things that couples and everything is just hunky dory, then that day comes where you just don'  t hear from the guy anymore. It'  s happened to the last 2 relationships with me, the others I don'  t want to mention because the guy that time was a psycho and out of my life but now that someone decent comes along it never seems to last or I end up not knowing where I stand with them. I'  m a rational person. I never do anything stupid to put the relationship at jeapordy. Quite frankly I'  m great to have as a companion.

I'  m with someone now at the moment but I'  m not with him. Could it be that neither of us know where we stand with each other.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

This is difficult to respond to without knowing a lot more information. A simple (and perhaps simplistic) response would be that it could be down to the age you are at present (23) - many young adults are wanting to explore and have fun and not take things seriously. However, maybe it feels like more than that. In which case, and this is not to shift blame at all, but we all send messages without knowing it (e.g. the shy person is scared to interact so she folds her arms around her to feel safe and doesn't make much eye-contact with anyone, or is brief/curt in her interactions with others - this might look like stuck up, arrogant behaviour to others). So have a think what you 'send out there'. If this has come up three times, it's the beginning of a pattern that you have to take seriously. Ask trusted friends (female and male) what they see you sending out there...this could add to your understanding. Finally, if you feel used by having sex and then them leaving, don't have sex until you are happier that this relationship might last a while.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: LM | 2008/09/11

You go girl!!! maybe he is that into you and you will be surpized!!! if not there are plenty of fish in the sea :) mr right will come riding in eventually on his white horse and all the shining armour....

Reply to LM
Posted by: questionable | 2008/09/11

Thanks. I' ll do that. I can take a hint as well and the hint I am getting strongly is he' s just not that into me. Aaaah damn. Oh well time to move on I guess.

Reply to questionable
Posted by: LM | 2008/09/11

Have you tried talking to him? maybe it is time that you take him, sit him down and tell him how you feel and tell him that if it doesnt change then you are going to change things. Give him the ultimatum and make him decide. Play hard to get for a few days and see him chase after you again, if he doesnt then sorry gal it never was meant to be in the first place.......:)

Reply to LM
Posted by: questionable | 2008/09/11

I' m turning 23 and he is 26. But he sure did chase me now I' m left to wonder what the hell more do you want from me besides the sex???? It is so frustrating. Before I was enjoying my freedom of being single. I should just go back to it. I don' t have time to waste on things like this. Take it or leave it.

Reply to questionable
Posted by: LM | 2008/09/11

First of all how old are you and how old is he? remember that the word " commitment"  is serious giborish to a guy!!! and honey let the man do the walking, if he cant see what a good thing he has then to hell with him!! if he wants to open that door to go, open it for him and kick him under the-|-too :). Lately guys dont know what the hell the word long term means - it is soooo sad.....good luck

Reply to LM

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