Our expert says:
Was the councelling purely for you - or was it marriage counselling ? People too often think of marriage counselling as intended to be a form of Superglue to stick a couple together forever, whereas I see it, when done by a properly skilled counsellor, as enabling both spouses to have an opportunity to express their problems with and to each other, and to explore whether the relationship is possible to fix - and whether it is worth fixing, and to be in a better position to make an informed decision as to whether or not to divorce.
And while drugs can be helpful in treating specific and properly diagnosed psych conditions, they NEVER fix marriage or relationship problems, and may indeed make them worse.
I'd elaborate your closing question - what could usefully be done to prevent these idiotic flings that often foul up a previously good and functional relationship ? Its always better to prevent damage than to fix it
And a thought. Loving someone doesn't always mean its a great idea to stay together. I love the msic of Mahler, but I'm sure we'd have been miserable living together
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