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Question
Posted by: Kim | 2012/05/31

The End

Hi CS

Throughout the course of my relationship i have always asked for your advise,but im afraid this is the last time im posting anything about my current relationship because i feel like the End of it is Near

just to sumarise everything ,ive been in a relationship with a father of 2 for 5 years,it will be 6 on july the 7th thats if we make it to july,typical relationship issues,a man that never wanted to talk about issues having to bring up things all the time because im the talker in the relationship,a man that still had an attachment to his ex (being the mother of his son)

He flipped out a few months back when he realised that i have been in contact with my ex and ommited that from him,which led to him spilling his guts about our relationship to his ex(which he says he feels she is the one person who knows him) He was never a social networker so from then on he is on every social network there is ,HE DOES NOT TALK! and i never asked him about his social networking ,quite frankly i am Sick of having to did our relationship issues from him,or always initiating talk,makes me feel like he does not want to resolve anything,saw messages from his ex this morning reminiscing about old times,i feel like he opened that door and i will not even argue with him about that that is for him im tired of fighting.

Hence i have come to the conclusion that i am DONE

He knows there are issues ,he feels the tension and distance but will not talk,spoke to the daughter about the possibility of a Split between me and he father ,she cried ,so i am also scared because the children love me and i also have a lot of love for them

I just feel like the relationship is no longer working for me ,my partner is also not helping.

Please tell me CS where do i start ? who do i call,i want out but i also want a smooth break up for the Kids sake

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Interesting how someone who in real life seems reluctant to talk, bit in the unreality of social media, is happy to chat around. Presumably it is the unreality of those chats, their anonymity, that makes him feel more free to chat ?
Is it not possible to persuade him to join you in marriage counselling ? If he could see that as a no-blame and safe place to explore and seek solutions for problems, maybe he could consider it ?
Otherwise, if he refuses to try to solve these, and/or if you are determined to separate, then though counselling could still help you to work out how best to do this and to protect all of you, isn't it a lawyer you might need to see if there are any formalities to be carried out ?
What do other readers, some of whom I know have been through similar situations, have to suggest ?

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1
Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/05/31

Interesting how someone who in real life seems reluctant to talk, bit in the unreality of social media, is happy to chat around. Presumably it is the unreality of those chats, their anonymity, that makes him feel more free to chat ?
Is it not possible to persuade him to join you in marriage counselling ? If he could see that as a no-blame and safe place to explore and seek solutions for problems, maybe he could consider it ?
Otherwise, if he refuses to try to solve these, and/or if you are determined to separate, then though counselling could still help you to work out how best to do this and to protect all of you, isn't it a lawyer you might need to see if there are any formalities to be carried out ?
What do other readers, some of whom I know have been through similar situations, have to suggest ?

Reply to cybershrink

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