Our expert says:
Sounds like a dreadful case of Teenager. And fortunately she will in time grow out of it. Remind her that she is indeed loved, though sniping at her sister is unloveable, and she's only being blamed for things she chooses to do, and, by chosing not to do them, she can avoid being blamed.
You can point out that its the lying that gets her into more trouble than the things she chooses to lie about.
This age is difficult to handle. Keep to a consistent set of rules about the important things ( ignore the trivial ), and with consistent rewards for good behaviour and penalties for bad behaviour. Consistency is essential, for ma and pa must agre and respond in the same way to the same provocations. And good behaviour for the week should be required to earn the weekend rewards, mall visits, etc.
Sorry to hear the particular counsellor wasn't useful, as it shouldn't be hard for a counsellor to help you through these annoying times.
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