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Question
Posted by: Suspicious | 2012/07/24

Suspicious....

Hallo doc,
I have been married for just over 3 years to a loving man. We are a happy couple. Obviously we do have a few hicups, but generally we work our differences out fairly quickly.

The past few months I have however started to be suspicious of him. I suspect that he might be ''cheating'' on me.
And yes, I am the first to admit that I am a very suspicous and jellous person. I know that.

He never leaves his phone alone. Not for a second. Not even when going to bathroom. When I walk past ihim while he is texting someone etc, he would suddenly close whatever he is busy with. When I ask him who he was texting, he would just say one of his friends.

I dont know if I am being unreasonable and just suspicious for nothing.

I dont want to blame him for something he is innocent of, but it is distroying my trust in him.

He sometimes work late, and now I have been wondering whether he really works late.

How should I approach this?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Have you spoken to him about this ? Such as asking him why he seems suddenly to be so very protective of his phone. From out here, we cant tell you whether your suspicions are valid or not. But it is reasonable to find it suspicious, especially if it is a change in what used to be his usual behaviour. You could perhaps check at the office as to whether he is actually working late, if this is practical.
I tend to agree with Chris, that people with nothing to hide, tend not to hide it
Could you possibly persuade him to consider entering some marriage counselling sessions with you ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: Auth | 2012/08/04

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Reply to Auth
Posted by: Sam | 2012/07/25

My dear i have been through this after 4 months of marriage...A phone that is forever under protection is enough for you to be suspicious. Passwords on the phone is also a sign of cheating, gaurding the phone like a hawk a big no no, i was divorced after 2yrs of marriage and when confronted BIG denial and you get blamed for being insecure and huge arguments would evolve that makes you feel quilty all I can say is trust you instincts it is not NORMAL behaviour. He has something to hide.

Reply to Sam
Posted by: Chris758 | 2012/07/24

Hi.

I am a man and married and if either of the partners does what you describe there is reason to be suspicious. You are not unreasonable to think this. If he has nothing to hide or not texting someone he should not he should be able to leave his phone where you can see it and even answer it if it rings!!

3 years into a marraige and this happens......it is not good!!

Reply to Chris758
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/07/24

Have you spoken to him about this ? Such as asking him why he seems suddenly to be so very protective of his phone. From out here, we cant tell you whether your suspicions are valid or not. But it is reasonable to find it suspicious, especially if it is a change in what used to be his usual behaviour. You could perhaps check at the office as to whether he is actually working late, if this is practical.
I tend to agree with Chris, that people with nothing to hide, tend not to hide it
Could you possibly persuade him to consider entering some marriage counselling sessions with you ?

Reply to cybershrink

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