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Question
Posted by: Goes again! | 2009/11/06

Summons - Divorce

Married in community of property for 1 year with 3 children. He' s got his own house and I have mine, all before we got married. In the summons he wants to keep his assets and I keep mine. Maintenance: he says (to be discussed). He is an advocate and I am not in the same field.Meaning I may need lawyer (in Pretoria).
I don' t want to contest the divorce, need to know if I do really need a lawyer even if I don' t contest.
Before the summons, earlier the morning of 27/10/2009 I had applied for maintenance. Forgot income/expense docs at home that morning. In the maintenance meeting, he was furious and called me a psychophat... I had taken him for maintenance cos he was not contributing towards raising the kids. He only paid school fees for 2kids and neglected to do anything for the youngest kid (1year). On Monday 02/11/2009 i got the summons, drafted on 27/10/2009. (May have reacted to the maintenance issue)
Looks like he had arranged to marry me to spite me!! The first time he left I called police to sit in while he took he belongings from the flat in 2006. At that time he had an was affair and worse of he was physically and emotinally abusive. I retaliated by answering back, he would bit me. We parted and he came back about 6months later. We talked about the issues and i thought we resolved. When he moved in with me kids. A few months down the line, he suggested we go to magistrate court to civilize our marriage. Afterwards, he started to show the " old-self" . Came home late, claimed he' s working for kids. Had excuses over weekends, only to find he' s back with the 2006 woman (either that or they NEVER parted,I think!)
WHAT I AM CERTAIN ABOUT IS THAT THERE' S RELATIONSHIP IS DEAD HERE. WILL I BE COMPROMISING MYSELF AND KIDS IF I LET HIM KEEP HIS ASSETS AND I REMAIN WITH MINE? By the way he even says I shall be left poor monetarily because I' m swimming in debt.
Thanx in advance for advice.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageDivorce support expert

Uncontested are very possible without a lawyer if both parties are civil with one another. The history of abuse and cheating you mention warns me to be cautious about this man and that you need to protect yourself, however you need a lawyer who does know how to consider the children and not have them caught in a battle which is not theirs.

Pls contact me for a legal referral.

info@sadsa.net

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