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Question
Posted by: Alex | 2012/06/11

Stuck

I have been married for 21 years and it ended 6 months ago. (He left me and it still hurts.) I have very few friends left. In my head I make all these plans to start doing things and to get a life, but I seem to never get moving on anything. I am literally stuck. I go to the office, gym and home (alone). It''s pathetic. How do I get moving?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Sorry to hear that he apparently treated you badly and caused you such hurt. 6 months is still early, as its often 9 to 12 months before one more noticeably gets over such hurt. Counselling can be very useful to help you let go of the hurt and move on with your own life. The best option now would be to work with a counsellor to make AND KEEP realistic plans. You WILL be able to get over this and become stronger, as you start to own your own happiness and not see it as being within his gift, to give or withhold

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Tanya | 2012/06/12

Alex, your story is so sad really and it pulls at the heart strings. Wives sometimes give up so much for their marriage and family and then, suddenly, have to move on by themselves.
6 Months is not a very long time when it comes to " getting over"  things like this - you''re lucky you have a job to go to, can afford to go to gym and have a home.
You dont say what caused your marriage to end but my advice would be :- be patient with yourself, look after yourself and if you need any meds. to help you through, get some. There are over the counter stress meds. or you could see a doc.
Wish you all the best, just take one day at a time.

Reply to Tanya
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/06/12

Sorry to hear that he apparently treated you badly and caused you such hurt. 6 months is still early, as its often 9 to 12 months before one more noticeably gets over such hurt. Counselling can be very useful to help you let go of the hurt and move on with your own life. The best option now would be to work with a counsellor to make AND KEEP realistic plans. You WILL be able to get over this and become stronger, as you start to own your own happiness and not see it as being within his gift, to give or withhold

Reply to cybershrink

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