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Question
Posted by: Eloise | 2010-04-02

STRANGE BUT TRUE

I''ve got a friend that stays far away. He comes to visit his daughter from time to time and then also sees me. He has been divorced for 10 years, but still talks about his ex wife a lot, as he feels bitter towards her for breaking up their family life.

We spent Christmas together and he then told me that he can''t afford a relationship right now as he is worried about his finances.

He came to visit his daughter this weekend and has asked me out to dinner tomorrow night. He then spoilt it all by saying we should just go to a nice family restaurant, nothing to expensive. I am not the type of person who is concerned about money and will never order the most expensive meal on the menu. Should I offer to pay for myself? When he takes his daughter out he spares no costs and let her stay in a penthouse and pay for her studies, her horse, her car everything. When he comes to visit he always spend the first night or two entertaining her and then want to see me. When he sees me he act almost like a stranger, doesn''t kiss or hug me to say hello or goodbye and doesn''t even touch my hand.

How do I handle this?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Sounds like he's prepared to be a friend to you, but not too closely, and I'm wondering why you seem to think you should put all your eggs into this one basket ? For him to want to pay for his own daughters studies is commenda ble - I don't understand wasting money on an unnecessary penthouse if he's at all short of cash, though.

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3
Our users say:
Posted by: Maria | 2010-04-03

If you want more than platonic friendship from him then you''re going to be disappointed.

Reply to Maria
Posted by: cybershrink | 2010-04-03

Sounds like he's prepared to be a friend to you, but not too closely, and I'm wondering why you seem to think you should put all your eggs into this one basket ? For him to want to pay for his own daughters studies is commenda ble - I don't understand wasting money on an unnecessary penthouse if he's at all short of cash, though.

Reply to cybershrink
Posted by: Tasja | 2010-04-02

Wave him goodbye,sounds like you are just a passing time thing to him!

Reply to Tasja

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