Our expert says:
Don't let them turn this ino an argument about whether you should get what you want from the lazy girl -- it's about bringing up a child prperly, for her own sake, as she needs to learn to share the chores in a home, and not to expect her parents to be her servant. And surely your husband can't be crazy enough to be thinking of buying a car for a girl of 13 ? Doesn't the fact that she says that, suggest rather that she is keen on getting atrtention and bragging, perhaps because she feels insecure with you around, that she might not be the most important person in his life ? \
Discuss this calmly with her father, and work out a plan, which clarifies what tasks she will do, amongst the tasks he and you do. And of course they need to be done properly, or they must be repeated until it's properly done, not merely a half-hearted pretence. Then both of you make an effort to give her plenty of attention and praise when she does things that you expect, and a whthdrawal of atention when she doesn't, along with stated penalties, withdrawing for a day something she wants ( TV or PC access, being allowed to go out with friends, whatever she wants ) if she does NOT do what is expected. So she gets les of whatever she wants when she doesn't kep to house rules,and more of what she wants when she does it right
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