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Posted by: Momma | 2012/03/15

Stay at home

I stay at home and looking for a job without any luck . I''ve been unemployed for over 7 years and I find myself longing for human contact every day. I take my kids to school come home do some house work then I''m alone until my kids come back from school. I even call myself a loner, always alone. I eat lunch by myself 5 days a week. I registered to study correspondence, I thought it will help me, I''ll have something to stimulate my mind/intelligence with but I''m still alone. Now when I think of finding a place I can volunteer at I think about my school work, house chores and picking up the kids at 1:30. Which doesn''t give me enough time from 8:30 when I come back in the morning to 1:00pm when I have to pick up the kids. Many times my husband don''t call me when he''s at work and that makes my days worse. Don''t have enough money to always call my friends and besides my friends have jobs. Sometimes I think of maybe finding someone to fiddle with during the day which of course is a bad idea. Any ideas what I can fill up days with that will offer some human contact?:(
Thanks!!

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I hope other readers can come up with some constructive and helpful responses here.
Have you really seriously looked into possibilities of volunteer work nearby ? If within 30 minutes drive, you could manage 4 hours a day. Can you chat with other moms from the school, who may be in a similar situation, who may have ideas, or may enjoy getting together for coffee or suchlike ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: Mom who wishes to be home | 2012/03/16

You are in a way very lucky to be able to live comfortably with just one person working in your family. I wish I could be home with my kids.

You obviously drive as you have to pick the kids up. Have you never considered even asking the kids'' school if they could do with a volunteer. You may be surprised that you could be a teacher assistant or something like that.

Study something like and early childhood education course, which will entail you doing some work at a school. There are many organizations that you can volunteer at. Look for orphanages where you can go and assist during the day at your own time. Volunteer for CANSA. Check with school if they have a fundraising committee and say you want to volunteer.

You don''t say where you live, then maybe people can give you suggestions.

Reply to Mom who wishes to be home
Posted by: Megs | 2012/03/15

Ok, I have to be honest here. The problem isn’ t that you can’ t a find a job- you can’ t find a job that would fit into your schedule of being an at home mom too. There are very few halfday jobs available, unless you work at a shop or something with long working hours, and the shop employs “ morning”  shift people and “ afternoon”  shift people.

I think if your husband can’ t afford the extra strain on the budget for you to join a hobby class (because things are just getting more and more expensive)  maybe you should consider getting a part time job. Yes, it would mean that you can’ t be at home when your kids come home from school, but there are THOUSANDS and THOUSANDS of families where BOTH parents work. How old are your kids? Are they old enough to look after themselves in the afternoon? If they aren’ t, what is the school aftercare like? You could employ a nanny (seeing that you’ d be earning extra income)?

Your children are not going to die if you are not there everyday after school and you would then get the social interaction you so badly desire.

Reply to Megs
Posted by: Anon | 2012/03/15

I am in the same boat as you, also studying through correspodence and home alone all day.
Ask your husband if you can afford a few extra bucks in your budget for you to spend on a hobby such as painting or other arts and crafts classes, most of them lasts 2 hours max and some of the people who offer them can be very flexible to accomodate you.
I''ve attended all sorts of classes/workshops and in my experience they are very social, relaxed gatherings and the vast majority of people who go to them are friendly and encouraging. Even if you don''t find something that you like it''s a great opportunity to meet people.
Alternatively theres always yoga classes or if you just want to get out of the house gymming.
Also, I don''t know if you''re religious, but most churches in our community have weekly bible study groups during the mornings.

Rather find a way to forge friendships and enrich your life than ruining it with a bad idea.

Reply to Anon
Posted by: Zim | 2012/03/15

Sell fruits and vegetables

Reply to Zim
Posted by: Anon | 2012/03/15

How old are you? How many children do you have?

Reply to Anon
Posted by: Johan | 2012/03/15

You can contact me - we can chat - johan dot johan38 at gmail dot com

Reply to Johan
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/03/15

I hope other readers can come up with some constructive and helpful responses here.
Have you really seriously looked into possibilities of volunteer work nearby ? If within 30 minutes drive, you could manage 4 hours a day. Can you chat with other moms from the school, who may be in a similar situation, who may have ideas, or may enjoy getting together for coffee or suchlike ?

Reply to cybershrink

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