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Question
Posted by: Nadene Viljoen | 2009/10/05

SON WON' T TALK

My son is 16 years old, I can see there is something bothering him when I ask he gets cross saying everyone is on his case and nagging him which just makes him cross everyone must leave him alone, it doesn' t help the situation. He would rather stay at a friend then be at home. He just won' t open up and talk to me, how do I get him to talk or find out what is wrong?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageTeen expert

Hi Nadine,

it is not that unusual for a guy of his age to react in this way - especially if something is bothering him. He is at a point where he will prefer his peers company to that of adults, and parents are often shunned more than other adults. Letting him know you are there if he wants to talk and leaving it at that has better results than trying to make him speak. You can also acknowledge that he may prefer to speak with someone else and that is fine, as long as he is ok.

From there monitor things for a while because you have to trust your instincts as well, and it will be clear to you if you need to do more.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Teen expert | 2009/10/13

Hi Nadine,

it is not that unusual for a guy of his age to react in this way - especially if something is bothering him. He is at a point where he will prefer his peers company to that of adults, and parents are often shunned more than other adults. Letting him know you are there if he wants to talk and leaving it at that has better results than trying to make him speak. You can also acknowledge that he may prefer to speak with someone else and that is fine, as long as he is ok.

From there monitor things for a while because you have to trust your instincts as well, and it will be clear to you if you need to do more.

Reply to Teen expert
Posted by: KAYLEE | 2009/10/12

I JUST TURNED 20 YEARS OLD, WEN I WAS THAT AGE I HATED MY PARENTS FOR NO REASON AT ALL, I JUS WANTED TO BE ALONE AND BY MY SELF I WOULD RATHER SPEND ALL NIGHT CHATTING TO A FRIEND ON THE PHONE OR LISTEN TO MUSIC THEN TALK TO MY PARENTS, ITS JUS THE WAY I FELT, I WASNT DOING DRUGS. I WASNT BIENG SEXUALLY ABUSED I WAS JUST AT THAT STAGE WHERE MY FRIENDS SEEMED MORE IMPORTANT, THINGS WILL GET BETTER I PROMISE BY THE END OF THE YEAR HE WILL HAVE CHANGED AND OPENED UP MORE, JUST BE PATIENT WITH HIM AND LET HIM KNOW THAT NO MATTER HOW BIG THE PROBLEM MAY SEEM U GUYS WILL ALWAYS STAND BY HIM AND HELP HIM

Reply to KAYLEE
Posted by: almost mad | 2009/10/09

4 options
1) he' s taking drugs
2) he' s being abused sexually or physically/bullied
3) Pubity late stage
4) he' s depressed

Reply to almost mad

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