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Question
Posted by: heartsore | 2008/08/06

son has a boelie

My son is eight years old and in the aftercare where he has only been 4 days, has now got a boelie there. The other boy has a friend who helps him loor the poor kid around the corner then hit him around a little. This is breaking my heart and I do not know what to do. My son is bigger than the average eight year old. Dad is over 2m tall and very wide (not fat!) and son takes after him. But beneath those big exteriors are very soft and gentle hearts. My son also has a problem keeping friends. He has been in his school now for 2 years and still has not been able to make a friend. He only gets teasing. Help me help him please. I cry over this most eveings (without him or hubby seeing) Thanx

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Our expert says:
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Such behaviour should never be tolerated by the school or the teachers or whoever is responsible for the aftercare centre. Tell them about this, and ask them to keep an eye on the bully and his pal, and to discipline them, without, if possible, revealing that it was your son who complained.
Overall, though, it may help for him to see a child psychologist ( the school should be able to recommend one ) for a couple of sessions to work on the problems of being a teased victim and how to change that and to make friends

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Our users say:
Posted by: my son' s bully | 2008/08/07

My son was bullied when he was in Grd 2 by the daughter of a ' friend'  of mine all because her mom and I had a fallout. I went straight to the school and confronted the girl who happened to be 3 times my son' s size and in Std 3. Boy, did I let the little cow have it and then to my amazement her parents approached the school and made a big song &  dance out of it and we all ended up having to see the Principal. Her arrogant father ended up being not-so-arrogant, especially when I insisted on calling witnesses. Apparently the brat got a hiding she' ll never forget but unfortunately her father is still so arrogant and full of himself :-)

Reply to my son&#39 s bully
Posted by: BMJ | 2008/08/07

Heartsore, why dont you ask your son to invite a friend (just some biy that he might like) to come and play on a saturday morning. I find that really helps to build friendships.

Good luck
BMJ

Reply to BMJ
Posted by: Kay in Gtown | 2008/08/07

My daughter was bullied in Grade 6 and had a terrible time, her marks dropped badly and she went into a depressive episode, Definitely let the school management know and I would also take him to a psychologist. If you have a psychiatric hospital nearby, your child can often see a psychology intern for free. It is SO worth it. My daughter learned coping skills, her and I got very much closer and in the end she gained far more from the whole experience than the bully, who is still a jealous, mean-spirited girl. My daughter is now confident and just brushes off people who try to bring her down. Let your son know you are completely on his side and he is not at fault, and that he has you as his champion. Let your son see that something CAN be done about the situation.

Reply to Kay in Gtown

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