Our expert says:
Sounds like the sister is being greedy and selfish and thoughtless. She is not entitled to spend his money or to dictate to him how he should spend his own money. Why can't the sister work and earn her own living ? And if she was married, why isn't her husband paying maintenance for his child ?
And chance of persuading your husband to join you in somem marriage counselling ? Both to sort out these specific problems, and to work out and agree on a betyter way for the pair of you to solve other problems as they arise ?
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