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Question
Posted by: Finished/Enough | 2012/10/09

Sister in law - cheating - gossips

I want to destroy her.

I live a clean honest life but she goes out of her way to spread lies and gossip, my husband has told her to stop, she even denies that she said these things until once I called the woman who told me, this woman''s husband and then went to where my husband and sister in law was - there was a huge confrontation as these two women (both married where fighting about a man- no not the one she is having an affair with - another one). She then just said that woman is lying even though the woman''s husband backed it all up.

I found out that she is having an affair and that on Thursday she will meet him. He is flying into the country and he will tell his wife he only landed the next day. She is telling her husband she has to work late. (my husband told me this)

Do I call her an hour before and tell her have fun this afternoon it might be your last time, so think carefully before you open your mouth again and put the phone down and just denied I did that if she tells my husband or admit it OR do i send her this 1 page letter I''ve prepared telling her just about the same? Including names of the man''s family etc to prove I have their details? (thanks facebook)

She just needs to leave me alone. I have not spoken to her since 2007 when she asked me to lie for her should her husband look for her. Since then she has hated me and made sisters etc NOT invite me to stork teas etc. Why spread these stories to everybody and my husbands family? They now don''t like me and I don''t go there because obviously she is family and my husband does not like confrontation and won''t stand up.

I am NOT going to just leave it. Me and my husband had a huge fight because he say''s we are putting him in a bad position as he works with her and lives with me. What did i do? Just stop the lies.

People in glass houses should not be throwing stones.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Why waste time effort and risk trying to "destroy" her ? Ignore her, and that removes her power to upset you.
Why have you chosen to get so involved with her and her life ? Why do you bother to know about the guy flying in and their other shabby plans ?
Revenge, or what you expect will be revenge, is rarely if ever as sweet as you expect it to be. From the sound of it this unpleasant woman has an unpleasant husband, and they deserve each other. Maybe shetries to disguise from herself the shabby misery of her life, by projecting it outwards and making up ugly stories about other people.
The more attention she receives, the mopre rewarding this is for her.
If she puts any nasty lies about you in writing, or in other ways that enable you to PROVE she did this, you might have a cause in law against her for defamation of character, but to check that you'd need to consult a lawyer

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

1
Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2012/10/09

Why waste time effort and risk trying to "destroy" her ? Ignore her, and that removes her power to upset you.
Why have you chosen to get so involved with her and her life ? Why do you bother to know about the guy flying in and their other shabby plans ?
Revenge, or what you expect will be revenge, is rarely if ever as sweet as you expect it to be. From the sound of it this unpleasant woman has an unpleasant husband, and they deserve each other. Maybe shetries to disguise from herself the shabby misery of her life, by projecting it outwards and making up ugly stories about other people.
The more attention she receives, the mopre rewarding this is for her.
If she puts any nasty lies about you in writing, or in other ways that enable you to PROVE she did this, you might have a cause in law against her for defamation of character, but to check that you'd need to consult a lawyer

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