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Question
Posted by: zola | 2011-12-20

should I cut all ties

10 years ago i cheated on my husband and i decided to tell my supposedly best friend. But After this i feel like my friend looks at me differently. I cannot bear to spend time with her or let alone see her because I feel like she sees this monster. we have never talked about it since. should i cut all ties with her, i love her but i feel this secrect is a burden for both of us and this affect my desire to see her. I live with the guilt daily. can you help me.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Is it really surprising that your friend looks on you differently, after learning that you cheated on your husband ? Presumably she didnt see you as someone who would do such a thin. It sounds as though your own guilty feelings make you reluctant to be wih her, IN CASE of what she might say, so you avoid seeing her and avoid tslking about it.
Discuss this with her, and see a counsellor to work on your guilt feelings.

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: Maria | 2011-12-21

Did you tell her 10 years ago? So you''ve been having an apparently close friendships with someone you don''t feel comfortable with for 10 years? If she really felt that way about you, why would she have continued the friendship for so long? Maybe you see yourself as a monster and you are burdened by what happened, but it''s easier to project these feelings onto your friend.

Reply to Maria
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-12-21

Is it really surprising that your friend looks on you differently, after learning that you cheated on your husband ? Presumably she didnt see you as someone who would do such a thin. It sounds as though your own guilty feelings make you reluctant to be wih her, IN CASE of what she might say, so you avoid seeing her and avoid tslking about it.
Discuss this with her, and see a counsellor to work on your guilt feelings.

Reply to cybershrink

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