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Question
Posted by: man | 2011-07-20

She loves me, and I love her but we are parting ways

I am having this sick feeling "  i suppose I am heart broken.

I am giving on up on the woman I love, we had problems for 2 years with no success. I have tried to resolve the problems and it got to a point were we changed.....but unfutunately my partner changed forever....although we love each other i think we both know it is not going to work and we are just afraid of being alone. Mainly me - I am turning 30 and in my measure I am supposed to be getting married and settling down....I am ready imotionally - financially sort of. and I am also mindful of the fact that I am never gonna be 100 % financially ready...BUT the relationship is wrong.

I recently learnt that the basic things that keep people together are no longer there. My partner is very angry most of the time and we argue on principles that we are all not able to change. Most of the problems emanate from money and family. Those are the two things that causes divorces anyway.

My biggest problem is that I love her family and my mother also adores her.....I love this woman greatly and i unfutunately have done all that I can....I have even suggested counselling to which is refused point blank. The last time i was in this situation - i promised to never return....but I am here again.

Recently our conversation were torturer - with me trying everything to avoid a fight and her doing her all to get even. Now it is a point that the support i needed from her - I am not getting and I dont think I will ever get it.

It is painful, but I have learnt I must let her go.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

If you are not succeeding in solving your interpersonal problems together, then you should have seen a couples counsellor to help you do so more effectively. If she refuses to sincereyl take part in counselling, then she is refusing to take the problems seriously or to seriously try to solve them. Faced with such a refusal, a relationship will fail, and it is better to end it and , with the aid of counselling if necessary, to move on, as you still have plenty of time to find happiness with someone else.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

2
Our users say:
Posted by: cybershrink | 2011-07-26

If you are not succeeding in solving your interpersonal problems together, then you should have seen a couples counsellor to help you do so more effectively. If she refuses to sincereyl take part in counselling, then she is refusing to take the problems seriously or to seriously try to solve them. Faced with such a refusal, a relationship will fail, and it is better to end it and , with the aid of counselling if necessary, to move on, as you still have plenty of time to find happiness with someone else.

Reply to cybershrink
Posted by: L | 2011-07-20

Are you asking something or telling only?

Reply to L

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